No I don't see a 'correct' perspective. Any philosophy has axioms...things which are 'self evident' (they are not in fact self-evident they just must be taken to be self evident in order for any thought process to be taken). One of the key axioms is the answer to what is the purpose of life?- someone who takes the hedonist view will have an entirely different ideology from someone who believes in service to God or whatever. A number of presumptions must be made in order to follow a logical line to a conclusion.

None can be considered wrong as there is no absolute truth. However, the only ideologies which have 'shades of grey' intrinsic to them are ones which incorporate pragmatism (which I detest). The others have shades of grey because it is impossible for people to distinguish the line of thought due to the limited human intellect.

While I accept there are other valid ideologies 1) People are usually being logically inconsistent and 2) I will always judge them according to, and try to convince them of my own ideology, which does not include pragmatism. Accordingly, I judge them with reference to what I consider to be perfection, and expect to be judged according to what they consider to be perfection.

I was not saying that going to bed at 8 o'clock was something I required or that had severed my relationship with my mother. I am saying that seemingly trivial things can cause me abject torture. And I know time can be one of them for some aspies.

No I don't think seeing the benefits of the label would have endeared me to the idea. As I said I am not a pragmatist. A mother should not require a label to avoid torturing her daughter. Some people cannot tolerate certain situaitons, simply saying this should be sufficient.

I can be extremely manipulative. I have a sharp tongue and I know where to hit when I want it to hurt. However, nobody would ever choose to humiliate themselves to manipulate someone. A person who was manipulative would calm down once they got their way not be emotionally drained and tearful for days afterwards. She shouldnt need a label to see that difference. The humiliation of that is as painful as the event. She never seems to get that 6 months later I can suddenly spend the weekend in bed in tears just thinking about what she did and worrying if she will do it again. She always assumes its some boyfriend issue.