Hey, I just signed up here because I don't really have a support network in person. We are struggling big time, mostly with food.

First, we are vegan (for many reasons that I refuse to get into, as a personal choice). My son is 5 and he understands the reasons and is proud to be vegan. But here's the thing..

While we eat everything that everybody else does (pizza, burgers, etc) it is made differently. The main ingredients?

Beans
Rice
Wheat

Recently my son had decided that he doesn't like anything that he used to. Suddenly he won't touch rice, tomato soup, quinoa, spaghetti, etc. All he wants is crap (chips, pizza, peanuts, mac and "cheese"). He is literally afraid of beans, and afraid of tomatoes. We have had two tomato melt downs recently, and I just feel at a loss for how I'm supposed to feed this kid lol.

Another issue, anytime he has wheat (like if we order vegan pizza) he gets tummy aches. I'm a mom of three, he is the oldest. I don't really have time to make him gluten free pizza on a daily basis I have more than just him to feed, I am exhausted (we have a 5 month old baby and an almost 4 year old girl). Please any insight you can give me would be appreciated.

He goes in kicks, where for a few days he would consume a banana smoothie on a daily basis (just bananas and water blended). But then he ran into a small "chunk" of banana and now he won't touch them again. Heeeeelp.

Oh, and he doesn't like anything brown.

Anyway, sorry that this is all over the place, it's been a long day already and I just want to shut myself in my room with ear plugs and disappear into a good book.

This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 12:24 AM by rawmamma.

welcome to AFF

Sounds like you have quite the challenge

It is great that you are proud to be vegan. But is it right to force that choice onto a child? Particularly if he doesn't like the food involved. It is scientifically proven that children taste food very differently to adults. Foods that taste fine to adults can taste awful to a lot of children.

I spent a lot of my childhood having tummy troubles because nobody knew about gluten intolerance. I don't know of any option other than avoiding gluten altogether.

Recently my son had decided that he doesn't like anything that he used to. Suddenly he won't touch rice, tomato soup, quinoa, spaghetti, etc. All he wants is crap (chips, pizza, peanuts, mac and "cheese"). He is literally afraid of beans, and afraid of tomatoes. We have had two tomato melt downs recently, and I just feel at a loss for how I'm supposed to feed this kid lol.

Another issue, anytime he has wheat (like if we order vegan pizza) he gets tummy aches. I'm a mom of three, he is the oldest. I don't really have time to make him gluten free pizza on a daily basis I have more than just him to feed, I am exhausted (we have a 5 month old baby and an almost 4 year old girl). Please any insight you can give me would be appreciated.

He goes in kicks, where for a few days he would consume a banana smoothie on a daily basis (just bananas and water blended). But then he ran into a small "chunk" of banana and now he won't touch them again. Heeeeelp.

Oh, and he doesn't like anything brown.

Hey, I know you from your food blog (I am a subscriber)!

Some of what you listed may be sensory. I have heard some people compare him eating something that disintegrates his sensory system is akin to you having sand in your eyes. I like Marsha Dunn Klein's story about grasshoppers (on her website).

Gluten sensitivity is not an uncommon issue w/autism. James Adams of ASU is doing a big study right now. There are a handful of vegan gluten-free blogs. Casein is another common problem, but you wont have that one to worry about . Tomatoes are likely upsetting his stomach. If he is communicating by his refusal that these foods are painful, you would not want to try to make him eat them.

People with sensitive GI systems often choose overly processed and refined foods because they are essentially "predigested". They are easier for him.

If he has insurance, I would recommend a good GI work up with a specialist who knows and is sensitive to children with autism (aspergers is autism, differing label due to lack of speech delay before age 3). You may want to be especially alert for "silent reflux". The school OT will not necessarily be familiar with oral/food sensory issues, but you might be able to get a referral to someone in your area with an OT who is; ask around first (parents).

He is a little boy who needs you to understand all of this from his point of view so he can be comfortable with food and at the family table. If you are too focused on the consumption of foods he isn't tolerating, his aversions would be expected to intensify and broaden.  By the way, eating one thing for a while then switching is called a feeding "jag". I do it all the time.  

Good luck!

This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 03:13 AM by awiddershinlife.

Poor little kid, it sounds like he's suffering from food intolerances - my daughter had miserable stomach cramps for years until I worked out that it was the lactose in cow's milk that she couldn't digest.  I swapped her to goat's milk and only gave her cow's milk in the form of yogurt or cheese, where the lactose has been pre-digested by bacteria.  She could handle that fine, without the excruciating stomach cramps.

The three staples that you mentioned are pretty notorious for food intolerance - I've worked the past decade in child care and seen how, particularly wheat, can really make a child's life a misery if they're intolerant to it.  Rice and beans are less so, but still, there are those who can't eat them.  I myself am allergic to soy (not just intolerant, I get full-blown anaphylaxis if I eat soy, I throw up, my face swells, I go into shock.)  This is especially dangerous for me, since soy is added to so many products now, so I have to read all labels or make foods from scratch.

I'd advise you to make an exception to vegetarianism for your son.  The alternative would be to let him starve to death, since he can't properly digest the food you're giving him, plus his quality of life must really be awful if he's suffering from debilitating stomach cramps.  I do understand about being tired - I suffered from undiagnosed Hashimoto's and Lupus for thirty years before getting diagnosed, so I wrote the book on fatigue - but for your son's health and quality of life, please think about letting him have some meat!  You wouldn't feed an obligate carnivore such as a lion rice and expect it to thrive - it would slowly starve to death since it's body is not set up to digest rice.  

If your son is grains-intolerant (I've seen it in a handful of children over the years) then he needs something he can digest.  And it sounds to me that he's not just being stubborn.  Experiment with meat.  Try him on oven-baked chips.  Give him a cooked chicken leg with veges.  It's better than letting your little boy starve to death on a diet his body can't handle.  

Also, you need to be aware that food intolerances tend to run in families.  Keep an eye on your other children.  If they are failing to thrive or suffering from tummy cramps a lot, or just small for their age, then swap them onto a modified diet as well.  Vegetarianism is fine for adults who can cope with it.  But it's unfair for a child, needing fats and protein to support their growing brains.  Give them some meat until they can decide for themselves what they want.

Alison

This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 04:46 AM by Alison.

Oh, I just thought, eggs are another good one you could try, and because there are so many different ways to prepare them, ie boiled, scrambled, omelette etc, it's a good way to maintain the interest.  Plus they're full of the sorts of things a developing brain needs.  Tinned salmon or tuna is another that can be prepared, and for a vegetarian option, you could try gluten free or rice noodles with vegetables mixed in.  Red lentils would be another nice one, you can do a lot with lentils.  And try him with soups, they can be bought in any supermarket in a wide range and are quick and easy to prepare.  You could make him garlic bread as a side, using gluten free bread spread with a commercial garlic butter and warmed in the oven.  Quick, easy, and I've never met a child yet who will say no to garlic bread!
Good luck!

Alison

... Another issue, anytime he has wheat (like if we order vegan pizza) he gets tummy aches. I'm a mom of three, he is the oldest. I don't really have time to make him gluten free pizza on a daily basis ...

Seems like a gluten intolerance. If he keeps eating gluten, his intestines will partially disintegrate.

You might also google leaky gut syndrome

and as a raw foodie, you are probably already familiar with raw vegan probiotics

This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 04:51 PM by awiddershinlife.

Hey rawmamma! So great to see another awesome mother of autism posting on here!

Anywho ~

I had an idea about your pizza-preparing-time-consuming predicament.
Perhaps you could make a few at once and freeze them *

...wheat ingredients don't lose too much of its already disintegrated nutrients from the freezing cold, logically speaking.

All the rest of the ingredies made by "man" are pretty much only good for flavor and feeling content with the belly grumbles for a few hours anyways.

* be sure to arrange your freezer in a way that would allow products to be stacked on top of the stored pizzas so that they may not get in the way of your other motherly-cooking duties.

[Cropped to reduce size of post]

Another issue, anytime he has wheat (like if we order vegan pizza) he gets tummy aches. I'm a mom of three, he is the oldest. I don't really have time to make him gluten free pizza on a daily basis I have more than just him to feed, I am exhausted (we have a 5 month old baby and an almost 4 year old girl). Please any insight you can give me would be appreciated.

He goes in kicks, where for a few days he would consume a banana smoothie on a daily basis (just bananas and water blended). But then he ran into a small "chunk" of banana and now he won't touch them again. Heeeeelp.

Oh, and he doesn't like anything brown. <<<
                                                                      ^
Little_Note_Leaver: Hahahaha!! Get him a $1 pair of polarized glasses.

Anyway, sorry that this is all over the place, it's been a long day already and I just want to shut myself in my room with ear plugs and disappear into a good book. <<< So you think in PICTURES, eh? You're obviously a great mother, my mother would've thought in shoes, purses, diamond rings and fancy cars! Lol.

This post was last modified: 04-29-2012 04:55 PM by Little_Note_Leaver.

So sorry for the double-post but I had another idea of modest advice for your sons eating dis-habits

a) Phobia for brown foods
    1. Probably caused by terrible experience with a similar hued food
    2. Probably won't be eating any of That any time soon, eh?
        i. Deliberately cook something delectable that has brown INSIDE, without his knowledge
       ii. Ask him if he enjoyed it, and if he noticed anything special about it
      iii. Tell him to remove his cool polarized shades (that protect his eyes) and see...

... Brown is only an illusion which our eyes not see but perceive. Tell him that no matter what color anything is ~ ~ ~ you have to see with your heart, then feel with your soul. Let your spirit be free from the enslavement that "vision" has binded to. Then tell him you love him, with a smile

- Jeau Vaughan

So sorry for the double-post but I had another idea of modest advice for your sons eating dis-habits

a) Phobia for brown foods
    1. Probably caused by terrible experience with a similar hued food
    2. Probably won't be eating any of That any time soon, eh?
        i. Deliberately cook something delectable that has brown INSIDE, without his knowledge
       ii. Ask him if he enjoyed it, and if he noticed anything special about it
      iii. Tell him to remove his cool polarized shades (that protect his eyes) and see...

... Brown is only an illusion which our eyes not see but perceive. Tell him that no matter what color anything is ~ ~ ~ you have to see with your heart, then feel with your soul. Let your spirit be free from the enslavement that "vision" has binded to. Then tell him you love him, with a smile

- Jeau Vaughan

I'm against this, both as an autistic myself, the mother of an autistic, and a childcare professional.  That is a HUGE betrayal of trust on the mother's part and will only make the child distrust everything she says.  Not to mention most likely throwing everything eaten back up, not by being naughty, just by being made nauseus by the thought that you'd been tricked into eating something you're aversive to.
Alison

This post was last modified: 04-29-2012 11:15 PM by Alison.

^Good call. There are times when that strategy can work really well, but I don't think food is the place to employ it.

Speaking this time as a child professional who attends feeding seminars, Allison's comments are in alignment with current best practice. For examples, see Marsha Dunn Klein's "By Permission Only" and Cheryl Fraker's "food chaining"

We are talking about a little guy who may have already developed some food-trust issues.

If this were my child or client, I would want to fully understand the problem before I start attempting solutions - including a good GI work up.

Behavior is communication so what is the behavior (food refusal) telling you?

But LNL offers some good perspective-taking, which is what this little guy needs more of (I am referring to his perspective)

This post was last modified: 04-29-2012 11:45 PM by awiddershinlife.

I do think and intellectual discussion with a child is worth a try--- every day is time to discuss...  not talking down- like seriously telling a kid that for health purposes a variety of foods need to be sampled - speaking about ingredients-- taking the mystery out of food... food as science and nature.

oh and when/if rawmomma comes back I will go to my drafts folder and edit my initial reply from 4/27 when I read the first post.  If she does not come back then I won't have wasted time on it. There is a lot to food an kids and she probably knows a lot more than she is letting on from the first post where she was likely just overwhelmed.