Often I say something and people look at me like I'm a serial killer or something. People at my work thought cannibalism was illegal in the UK. I was pretty sure there was no specific laws prohibiting it (and there isn't as far as I or my lawyer friend are aware). I said it would be pretty hard not to break a law while carrying it out. desecrating human remains, assault, murder for example. I said that theoretically if someone cut a slab off their arm though and handed it to you, you wouldn't be breaking any laws by eating it.

I find it best to attempt to avoid topics involving death at all, even indirectly. Mentioning the solubility of cyanide raised a few eyebrows too. Sometimes I forget when someone else starts a topic.

I didn't consider that.  Good point.

Self diagnosis and professional diagnosis have one thing in common: they are both subjective.

You would think that professional diagnosis might be more accurate, but I have my doubts about that.

If you identify strongly with the traits and experiences of others on the spectrum, and you can get by without the support that a professional diagnosis sometimes makes possible, then there really isn't a need for a professional diagnosis. You're still getting used to the idea - give it a month or two and you will most likely be certain enough one way or the other that a professional diagnosis would be a waste of time for you.

Bergie, have you ever watched "The Big Bang Theory"?

There is a loveable character on that show named Sheldon who displays a lot of stereotypical aspie traits. One thing that I have noticed about Sheldon is that he is incredibly condescending to people, and he seems to be totally unaware of that.

One way I have partially overcome some of my negative personality traits is by observing other people. I sometimes see someone do something and think "wow, I do that too, and when someone else does it I can see that it really annoys people". Then I can make a conscious effort to avoid that behaviour. Maybe watching how Sheldon manages to come across as condescending would help you to be more aware of that behaviour in yourself?

Do you guys find it's easier to identify, adapt, and cope with work and social situations after you figured out you were an aspie?

Not really. What I do find is that I don't beat myself up over it as much as I used to. I'm 46, and I didn't figure out I was HFA until just over a year ago.

My ability to cope with work and social situations had already improved greatly since I was your age - through observation and experience.

I love that show and I did often relate to Sheldon's character.  One of the first things I thought when I started looking into Aspergers was that it sounded exactly like Sheldon and I saw on the character's wikipedia page that many people thought that.  I think the show would do a huge service to the community if they found a way to weave in the word Aspergers even if just in passing.

My parents were decesed before I knew anything ab out aspergers, so no help there.  Are you in the Phoenix Met area?  I have the name of an AZ psych who will diagnose adults in the Phoenix area that was sent out by the ASAN group that meets in N Tempe.

This post was last modified: 03-21-2011 08:28 AM by awiddershinlife.

Yes.  I am in SE Phoenix.

I will send the name to you in a day or so.

never take a dignosis like AS serioulsy... that is my motto on the subject. i mean diagnosis or not it still just a word- materialistic and meaningless.

Are you diagnosed, Black Butterfly?  

I was about 40 when the diagnosis was available and was 50 before I was familiar enough with it to realize that something finally explained me.  I had been trying to figure out what was wrong with me and what to do about it for half a century.  

Having a diagnosis didnt change anything in my life that anyone else would notice, but once I realized it was "something" I stopped being so hard on myself and relaxed about things I would never achieve.  I also began to appreciate things I could do that others couldnt. And finally, it gave me a peer group (you guys) with whom no one cares if I fit in or not cause few of us do.  We have a group [un]togetherness that I enjoy.

I liked the way it played out for me.  I grew up with a handicap (like a race horse) that I had to overcome.  My experience is that people who are diagnosed young grow up with a disability (that can lead to learned helplessness).

An AS diagnosis can't "explain" anything. It can't answer the question "Why am I different?" It isn't even a response to that question. It is a tool for answering the question "How many people are like me in ways x, y and z?" so that proper scientists can then go on to study why they have those characteristics in common. But in and of itself it explains nothing.

It did for me what I said it did for me.  Apparently it is different for you.

As a matter of logic and reason, it cannot do what you said it did for you.