Have a child who is autistic? Need a question to be answered about autism? You've come to the right place! I will answer any questions you have for me. But I have some questions directed to any parent who reads this and has an autism/asperger child. How old is your child? When did you first notice that your child is autistic? What qualities does your child possess that allowed you to assume your child is autistic? What does your child like to do in their spare time? What behaviors does your child have? Does your child have any friends? What's it like being a parent of a child so different? Those are the questions that all the parents who read this should answer and have children who are autism/asperger. I look forward to reading all of your answers tommorrow.

Just curious seeing you're new to the site... what qualifications do you have at 16 yrs of age and not a parent to feel comfortable with assuming you are able to help parents of autistic children and such unless you're a parent yourself? I haven't seen you on here much or seen much posted about yourself. I guess as a parent self-diagnosed Asperger's and a son with Moderate Autistic Disorder (termed as HFA), I also have a son that seems to fit NT like his father, I would rather know a little more about the person that supposedly could have answers to questions that a parent would possibly have dealing with their child on the autism spectrum. Maybe you'd like to introduce yourself a bit more so people can get to know you more and feel more comfortable asking you questions.

I guess what I'm trying to say is most parents NT or on the Autism Spectrum tend to prefer a more mature and more experienced opinion when dealing with a child NT or on the spectrum. Unfortunately being a parent gives you a little different knowledge on dealing with children in general than babysitting or just liking children in general. Dealing with children in general NT or on the spectrum, both have similiar issues in general but there are a lot of different issues as well due to how you deal with helping them succeed in life.

well actually you know how I am able to help you guys? is that being an autistic myself but I don't know which kind that's how I am qualified to help people and plus I know people with autistic relatives and autistic children

and NO I'm not a parent myself I've just learned and read alot about autism and aspergers

Than maybe you'd be better suited to helping autistic/aspie individuals like myself than trying to help solving parent-type issues with children. Unless you have a child yourself, you won't understand what it is really like to deal with a child from that level especially at your age. Parents often wish to talk to other parents as that is who is most experienced, not to a teenager unfortunately with no experience as a parent. Plus your attitude I saw on another thread towards NTs would preclude most NT parents wouldn't want to get advice from a person that insults them. That's just my opinion and from observations of NTs especially parents.

In this case, it's usually a case of stick to what you are experienced in. Parenting advice from a 16 yr old that has never had a child of their own is not always reliable. There are several of us on this board that are parents both NT and on the Autism Spectrum, both Autism and Aspergers and are here to help out with questions from NTs and others. Maybe it's best to leave it to them. Thanks.

I can see both of your sides. I'm 16 and not a parent either. However, parents do ask me for information or advice on occasion. I answer, as a person who researchs autism and has experienced it. I think the most useful area you *could* help parents with is when they ask "Why?" is their kid doing something and you have a theory. I understand sometimes it can be frustrating to talk to NT parents, but really most aren't bad people. They just see an upset kid and want to help.  :razz:

Like Catffienated, I can also see the point both of you are making.  I am an Aspie and parent of an Aspling.  I also research and learn a lot about Autism and AS.  I can say from my own point of view that it is hard for a parent to take advice from anyone who is not a parent.  But I also understand that being an Aspie makes you qualified to give advice because you understand what their child is feeling.  :?  

wondergirl, I think the way you present your offer to help is lacking the compassion that parents are looking for.  When I first read your post I thought you might be writing a book about AS, and came here for information about children to include in your book.  As a parent I find it intrusive when you request so much information up front.  I am more comfortable posting the concern and requesting your feedback.  I have no doubt that your input would be valuable to an NT parent trying to understand their childs behavior, and I commend you for offering them support :smile:.  Maybe you could revise your approach and try to present more understanding when you offer your assistance, I think you would get a much more positive response from doing so.

Crystal

I personally feel that as a parent of a ASD child with communication and learning difficulties, i do find that parents who have a child like mine do understand the upset and pure hard work of having a child with ASD. and in all fairness unless you have been there in that situation it can be hard to really understand the real strains from a parents point of view that this can have.
im not saying that a child or teenager with ASD or aspergers syndrome does not have the understanding but i am purely talking about it from a parents eye view of things and teenagers viewing them selves is slightly different.
I do think that any advice is welcome and you will either act on it or not and its kind of people to take the time and effort to help others along the way whether its adult or teenager.
and isnt that what a site like this is all about helping others?? i have always viewed it as that and i hope to continue to do so.  :razz:

I agree julieanne.

Two slightly different issues IMO.

No, non-parents cannot understand the rigours of parenthood but by the same token NT's cannot empathise with autistics, whether they are their children or not.

I don't need advice on how to parent but I do need advice on how to best be an advocate for my daughter and any information I can get to help me with that has to be a good thing.

Hi there

Evan is 9 years old and we noticed that there was something different about him when his youngers ister was born 2 years later.  We hadn't noticed it when he was born, because he was our first, but he didn't give eye contact, never cried, laid in him crib and scratched at the blanket that he laid on.

Evan has VERY strange behaviour pattersn, can't cope in strange or unfamiliar suroundings.

the friends that he does have are VERY close and love him to bits, none of them will let him get hurt emotionally and all do thier best to keep him "on an even keel".

My biggest problem is schooling, evan is classed as too autistic to be in mainstream but not autistic enough to be in special school so I home educate.  He also has Ankylosing Spondylitis , along with his sister and father.  I have just recieved notification that University of Sheffield has accepted me on thier Masters Degree course, provided I can find fuinding, which I probably can't now that evan is at home with me all the time it's only £1549 but its a lot to find on benefits.

Hope this answers you questions.

If you need any further info I am always willing to answer.

:grin: Well, I've been lurking for a bit, so I guess I'll take the plunge and make my first post.  

We have 5 children.  My Aspie child is 11.  I am 42, also Aspie.  I sometimes wonder if our oldest (22) might have some shadow traits.  The rest, and hubby, are clearly NT!

I realized my son is autistic about 8 months ago, a few months after I accepted the reality that I was autistic (about 11 months ago).  Until that point, I knew we were quirky, but I always assumedt we were within the bounds of "normal"!    :lol: It helps that I grew up with a dad who was just as quirky and socially inept as myself.  Hmmm... genetics...  :wink:
Qualities (both of us): highly gifted, very socially inept, loner, stims, gaze avoidance, intensely feels empathy, extreme difficulty expressing empathy...

Son: Pokemon, video games.
Self: internet

No.

So different?? He's not different.
OK, he's clearly different from our other 4 kids, but that's OK.  He's just like me!   :lol:

Cindy


Since you live in PA please teel me what you think of this

http://freeeric.tripod.com/

:shock: I have never even heard of this, AND I LIVE IN THE SAME COUNTY.  :shock:

I think this young lady was sincerely trying to help and it wasn't very nice for some people to put her down. At least she is taking an interest in the subject of autism - there are so many who don't want to know.