Amusing anecdotes from your childhood

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Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 01-16-2007 03:14 PM

This is a thread where you can tell us about amusing things which happened when you were younger, which make you laugh when you think back to them, especially if they're linked to AS traits.

To start off - when I was about 10 years old, I was sitting in class, when I could hear a girl on another table behind me joking that I fancied someone. (It wasn't true, I knew she was just saying it to tease me, in a joking way). Anyway, I felt really embarrassed by what she said. I had my ruler in my hand, and I started to bend it in order to take my mind off the embarrassment.

Then suddenly...SNAP! The ruler broke because I bent it too far. As I was looking at the broken halves, my learning support assistant came over, and asked how on earth I had managed to break the ruler. I told her that I did it because I was embarrassed at what the girl was saying, and she laughed and said, "Oh, you can't go round smashing things whenever you feel embarrassed!". That made me laugh even more.

By the way, it was my own ruler and not the school's, so I wasn't in trouble or anything.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Dragon - 01-16-2007 06:50 PM

When I was 5 I independently invented a jumper with a different colour when turned inside-out.
I started by putting a jumper on inside-out, then put on another jumper the correct way, and when both were taken off at the same time, turning the whole thing inside-out would produce the pattern/colour of the other jumper.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - caanilorac - 01-17-2007 04:22 AM

When I was one or two years old I got an electronic walking clown from my aunt for Christmas. It was an expensive gift. About two hours after I got it I had dismantled it and taken out the wires, there was no clown anymore and they had to throw the pieces away. I also dismantled a Furby and another toys when I was older.

I used to insult people accidentally quite often. Once I told a friend that her hair looked funny, tried to fix it, and then said "wait, it's just the shape of your head". I didn't understand why she got mad at that moment.

I planted skittles because I wanted skittles rain, I also did that to grow a money tree using my money instead of skittles... those kids were lying!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Arandomsum1 - 01-17-2007 06:37 AM

I was suspended for reading a book in english class...

nuff said...

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 01-17-2007 01:06 PM

Arandomsum1 Wrote:

I was suspended for reading a book in english class...

nuff said...

Big Grin 'Nuff indeed.

When I was really little -- about four -- I wanted to know what it would be like if I couldn't see. So I closed my eyes, ran around my grandma's back yard and fell head first into the fish pond.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 01-17-2007 10:26 PM

I've just remembered another story from my childhood.  When I was about 7 years old at primary school, this woman from the local authority used to come in for an hour each week to see me (I'm not exactly sure what her position was, but she must have been some kind of educational support worker).  She used to take me into a separate room where I could talk to her about how I'm getting on at school and she would try to help me become more confident.  She would also bring in some games and toys.

In the first session, she brought along this big dolls' house.  It was wrapped in a massive piece of bubblewrap.  And during the whole session, I hardly paid any attention to the dolls' house (I never liked make-believe play).  I spent all the time playing with the bubblewrap instead!  I stood on it, jumped up and down to see how many bubbles I could burst.  I was having a lot of fun with that, and at the end of the session, the woman said to me that she was surprised that I hardly touched the dolls' house, and that next week she would just bring in the bubblewrap on its own, seeing as I enjoyed that more.
And that's exactly what she did.  The following week she brought in the bubblewrap all on its own!

It makes me laugh when I think about it now!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Logical paradox - 01-18-2007 01:13 AM

Well..... I was in Sunday school, it must 1st or 2nd grade. We were discussing Genesis. And, of course, I was the kid who had to say, "Well, what about the dinosaurs?". My teacher froze, "Er...", then I continued, "Here is my theory...". I think the theory I gave was something like reincarnation, I was aware that my idea didn't work with the seven day thing, but I was too young to come to the conclusion of atheism.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - SinningBoldly - 01-18-2007 02:37 AM

I remember distinctly being given a doll's pram (stroller) for Christmas and feeling compelled to get into it. I remember struggling with my mother (while my father took a snapshot which I still have, today!) and having a melt down as I tore through the bottom fabric putting my 3 year old body into the little toy stroller. I also remember their disgust ( I was not diagnosed with AS until I was 56 years old, my folks had no idea what was up with me) that I was being 'willfull and disobedient' again and having my behind soundly paddled and made to use it anyway. I also remember putting dolls into it ( and crayons and paper and books and rocks and mud pies. . I didn't make distinctions) and wondering why they kept falling though.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - SinningBoldly - 01-18-2007 02:54 AM

I remember prouncing every word I heard in a song.  I would hear the words and 'talk' them out so others' could understand what was being sung.  I remember thinking they didn't know how to hear the words and I could, so I was 'helping' them by telling them the words. Didn't matter  how many times the song played, didn't matter who was listening, I was interpreting the song for them like it was in a different language and I was the only one that knew what the words were, and I was being gracious ( or so I thought) by letting them in on the meaning of the song.  I must have driven them crazy!
oh, yeah, and I have perfect pitch, so when my mother would sing lullabies to my brother and I, I would scream for her not to sing (my mother did NOT have perfect pitch, nor a decent singing voice)  I would rock and shout "don't sing, don't sing" holding my hands over my ears and moaning.  I was maybe 18 months that I first remembered it.
I was excluded from the lullabies after that.  Mom was deeply offended and hurt, I remember.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - paddyahern - 01-20-2007 01:01 AM

I remember the first time we were learning about religion in the Catholic primary school I went to. I was about 8 at the time.

The class were having a discussion about what they knew about catholicism and the teacher then started talking about the holy trinity. I was already confused, I was thinking everyone was talking about a film or a cartoon I hadn't seen so when the teacher started talking about the trinity I put my hand up and said "Who's Jesus?".

If I had left it there it would have been fine, but I didn't. The teacher explained who Jesus was, how he walked on water, rose from the dead etc. then this dialogue occured.

Me: So who's God?
Teacher: God is Jesus' father.
Me: So who's the holy spirit.
Teacher: The holy spirit is God.
Me: Is Jesus God?
Teacher: Yes, you're getting it now.
Me: Haha, I get it, your joking.
Teacher: I'm not joking, do you believe in God?
Me: No, you're all crazy, haha.

After that came a serious 3 hour indoctrination from one of the priests of the local church, in which I was obsessed with this guy's nose hair. Eventually I realised I had to pretend to believe to get out of the situation and go out and play.

I near got thrown out of the school because of that, and some kids actually tried to bully me for not believing in a fictional diety, although, by the time they reached 9 they had realised I was the only one in the school telling the truth.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Pakrat - 01-31-2007 01:09 PM

Paddyahern, I went to a Catholic school as a small child and there were Aherns in several classes, including my own.

Anyway, one of the stories I have is that I used to say when my younger siblings were annoying me... "you know...death can be fatal".

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Pakrat - 01-31-2007 01:12 PM

One of the funniest stories was when I was in grade 5. We used to go up to the convent to watch science programmes on the nuns' TV set.

Anyway on this one day, our teacher suddenly came out with "Who made that horrrrrrible smell?". I cracked up laughing about how she said it and didn't even notice any smell. The girls said it must have been one of the boys.

We all got into trouble for laughing and she threatened never to bring us to the convent to watch any more TV if we didn't behave.

Also, up until I was about ten, I thought only boys were capable of farting.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - maldoror - 02-03-2007 08:08 AM

When I was in 3rd grade I discovered the magic of AOL; one night I got bored and went into the chatrooms, and being 9 years old the first thing that came to mind when I saw the room name box was "f***." So, yeah, you can see where this went. I was really proficient with language as a kid so I chatted with the folks in room "f***" for a while without knowing what they were talking about for the most part, and then some girl offered to trade pictures with me. Well, I ended up sending her random pictures that were on the hard drive and she ended up sending me nudes. Needless to say, I was pretty confused, and when my dad got home I asked him what this ws about.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-03-2007 08:20 AM

paddyahern Wrote:

I remember the first time we were learning about religion in the Catholic primary school I went to. I was about 8 at the time.

The class were having a discussion about what they knew about catholicism and the teacher then started talking about the holy trinity. I was already confused, I was thinking everyone was talking about a film or a cartoon I hadn't seen so when the teacher started talking about the trinity I put my hand up and said "Who's Jesus?".

If I had left it there it would have been fine, but I didn't. The teacher explained who Jesus was, how he walked on water, rose from the dead etc. then this dialogue occured.

Me: So who's God?
Teacher: God is Jesus' father.
Me: So who's the holy spirit.
Teacher: The holy spirit is God.
Me: Is Jesus God?
Teacher: Yes, you're getting it now.
Me: Haha, I get it, your joking.
Teacher: I'm not joking, do you believe in God?
Me: No, you're all crazy, haha.

After that came a serious 3 hour indoctrination from one of the priests of the local church, in which I was obsessed with this guy's nose hair. Eventually I realised I had to pretend to believe to get out of the situation and go out and play.

I near got thrown out of the school because of that, and some kids actually tried to bully me for not believing in a fictional diety, although, by the time they reached 9 they had realised I was the only one in the school telling the truth.

Yeah that's pretty funny, eh?

I got another religion one. At six, I was staying at another girl's house, and she was teaching me what prayers were.

It went something like this.

Emma: Dear Jesus...
Me: Jesus? Who's Jesus?
Emma: Jesus is God.
Me: God who?
Emma: God made everything. The flowers and the trees.
Me: But the flowers grow by themselves.
Emma: But God made them that way.
Me: Oh.

And another time my mum was telling me about Catholic religion when I was seven. No-one in my family - to the best of my knowledge - has ever been Catholic and now no-one in my immediate family even has a religion. Mum told me that Catholic's believed that Mary was the mother of God, and my thoughts ran something like this. (at age seven.)

"Hang on. If Mary's God's mother, and God is Jesus' father, and Mary is Jesus' mother, then isn't that weird?" (Don't think at that stage I knew what Oedipal meant.)

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-03-2007 08:22 AM

Pakrat Wrote:

Also, up until I was about ten, I thought only boys were capable of farting.

Until I was ten, I thought that only men ever drank beer. Then I saw my grandma drinking beer and I was astonished.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - ichtms - 02-04-2007 07:25 PM

I remember one odd thought that I had as a child. It regarded objects & motion. I didn't see cars driving down the road as moving in a real way as long as they weren't changing in a physical shape or appearance

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 02-12-2007 10:11 PM

When I was about 6 or 7 years old, I asked my sister what caused thunder.  She told me that thunder is caused by clouds banging together!!  The scary thing is, I actually believed her for several years!!  It was only when we studied weather in science that I realised her explanation didn't make sense.

Another story:  When I was about 14, my Dad bought our first Windows computer with AOLinternet connection.  In those days, with AOL you could have up to 5 separate screen-names per account.  When I was in a chatroom one day, I saw that someone had the screenname Sweetie.  I decided that I liked the sound of that name because it reminded me of sweets/candy, so I set myself up the screenname Sweetee.  I didn't realise that the name has a second meaning!  Everytime I logged on, I was bombarded with instant messages from strange boys/men wanting to chat to me.  My Dad asked me why I had chosen the screenname Sweetee, and I said it was because I like sweets!  In the end, I had to block all incoming instant messages, because I didn't want to have to change my screenname.

We don't use AOL anymore though.  Once I reached the age of 17 or 18, I began to find the whole thing rather irritating.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Dragon - 02-15-2007 07:40 PM

I remember being at a car boot sale when I saw this amazing thing! It was a wooden square block that got a bit smaller towards the top. It was green with carves in it, a bit like a circuit board. Amazed, I asked, "What does it do?", and the man at the stall replied, "It doesn't do anything, it's just an ornament". And I was like WTF? It looks really cool but it doesn't do anything? He said, "It just sits there and looks nice".

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Ivar T - 02-15-2007 08:26 PM

At primary school we were going to have test. I hadn't prepeared very much for the test and I almost didn't really know what the test was all about. One of the questions were something like this:

Do you know what an adjective is?

And then I got a genious idea, write just what someone who knew the answer would have written, make a white lie. So I wrote:

...

"Yes"

And I honestly did, I was just uncertain if had mixed it up with nouns, but I couldn't really explain anything with my bad social skills at that time, especially not on paper.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-16-2007 07:14 AM

Sparkle1984 Wrote:

Replace the word "clouds" with "mollecules" and your sister wasn't that far off the mark!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Natalie - 02-16-2007 08:02 AM

This thread made me remember something that happened like 15 years ago, which I can't explain and still find kind of creepy. It's not really an anecdote since no conclusions can be drawn from it, but I'll share it anyway...

When I was like three or four years old, I was in the living room at night and it was completely dark in the room. I went over to the window and looked up at the sky, and there were green, glowing clouds in it. I'm totally serious. I watched the clouds for a couple minutes, and then went out into the other room to ask my mom about them. She said they were "dew". I don't know what that means, but now whenever someone mentions dew I think of the glowing clouds. It's really creepy.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 02-16-2007 11:58 PM

erkolos Wrote:

At primary school we were going to have test. I hadn't prepeared very much for the test and I almost didn't really know what the test was all about. One of the questions were something like this:

Do you know what an adjective is?

And then I got a genious idea, write just what someone who knew the answer would have written, make a white lie. So I wrote:

...

"Yes"

And I honestly did, I was just uncertain if had mixed it up with nouns, but I couldn't really explain anything with my bad social skills at that time, especially not on paper.

This kind of reminds me about a time when I had a French test at high school.  I was always in the top set for French, but one week when I was about 13 years old my family and I went on holiday during term time, which meant that I missed a couple of French lessons.

Anyway, on my first day back at school after my holiday, we had a French test where we had to translate the names of articles of clothing from English into French.  Due to the fact that I had been on holiday, I had no idea that we would even be having a test, and I had missed the lessons where the teacher taught the class about clothing.

So I just had to muddle through the test as best as I could.  I had no idea about the answers to most of the questions, so I made up French-sounding words for the items of clothing.  For example, for "a jumper" I put "une jumpere" with an accent on top of the 1st e for extra effect!! Rolleyes   I knew it would be totally wrong, but I thought it was better than putting nothing at all.

I got a really low score, about 3 out of 10, which was amongst the worst in the class, but the teacher must have realised I was away the previous week.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-17-2007 06:21 AM

At uni (all right - this isn't, technically, a "childhood" anacdote, but we're talking about "tests", right?) I was studying King Arthur at Tasmanian uni (now called Unitas because they want to be trendy and upbeat, or something.) And the question was how does this or that Arthurian movie relate to Australian history.

Anyway I remember this was almost the same day as the Republican election (which failed. Sad

) and so I somehow managed to string together this crap about how Monty Python & Holy Grail is a challenge against the monarchy and how this was relevant because Aus was challenging the monarchy at the time.

(The lecturer seemed to like it.)

I also had no idea what to write in some psych exam essay so I spouted some kind of stuff I'd learnt in Ancient Civs that year about how Aristotle thought that women and slaves were incapable of higher reasoning. Can't remember the essay topic or how this was relevant, but the first year Psych lecturer seemed to like that as well and SOMEHOW I ended up with an A.

Still don't know how. Funny the things you can get away with in uni.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - MercuryA - 02-19-2007 03:44 PM

When I was about 11 in Primary School we were made to play sports & I didnt see any use to knowing how to play (& I couldnt catch a ball if my life depended on it) so I just literally stood there doing nothing for the whole game. Id find ways to avoid doing anything, when we played Basketball/Netball Id just stand in the corner cos there was shade & if the ball came near me id just stick my hand out (I got that from Daria lol, it seemed like the perfect idea so I used it) & during cricket Id go & stand at the other end of the oval cos there was alot of shade. After a while the guys in my class knew I wasnt going to do anything so they made some1 come & stand near me to do my job, & since they had done that Id sit down in the shade & I even started having naps while they were playing lol.. 1 time the ball came right next to me & all the boys on my team were literally screaming at me to throw them the ball & I just stood there but after awhile their voices got irratating so I picked up the ball, threw it about 1 meter & yelled out I threw u the damn ball now leave me alone & I left & went back to the classroom lol... I was always so hurt that I got picked last for everything but now that I think about it I would pick me last to.

When I was in grade 8 at High School we had to take Health & PE & the teacher wanted us to play hockey & i just stood there the whole time, after awhile all the girls that had been bitching the whole time realised I hadnt even moved & they got into groups & started gossoping. About 15 mins later the teacher came up to me & said "Im so glad to see ur making an effort" & im fairly positive he wasnt being sarcastic lol. Then all the boys started yelling at the girls/me to play & we all got detention. I seriously think if the boys hadnt had a hissy-fit I wouldnt have got detention. It was the only time I ever got detention.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - MercuryA - 02-19-2007 04:09 PM

Oh another 1
When I was 10 at Primary School we had to play this game called British Bulldogs, dont know if any1s heard of it. I dont remember much about it cos I didnt care. Anyway my team was standing there (think we had to try & stop the other people from getting across the finish line) but nobody was ment to run yet. & this 13 year old grade 7 guy who was much taller then me started running, he was trying to be funny or something & the next thing I know I had grabbed the back of his T-Shirt, he was still running but he wasnt going anywhere & then he fell to the ground gasping for air.... Every1 was so impressed with what I had done & i didnt/still dont know how i did it? All i remember was facing 1 way & then the next second I was facing the other direction, holding some guys t-shirt & he wasnt going anywhere?? Thats the *only* cool thing I ever did during a sports game & I dont even know how. My sister was in grade 7 at the time & remembers it really well. It was so embarrasing, every1 was praising me & alot of them were patting me on the back & stuff. If they hadnt goten over it so quickly I dont know if I could have handeled all the extra attention...

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Callista - 02-19-2007 04:42 PM

I'm nine years old, and I've been dropped off at a private day-care. I sit in the kitchen, because it smells like diapers everywhere else and I can't bear to be there. I've stolen a book from my mom's bookcase, and I'm reading it. It's an autobiography of a girl who broke her neck and became quadriplegic. I'm rather proud of myself for reading an "adult" book in English (this was two years after I learned English), but I think the woman in the book is very silly. She's seventeen years old--almost double my age--and she doesn't understand what a fracture of the cervical vertebrae means, or that people don't automatically die if they break their necks, or that paralysis from a broken spinal cord is usually permanent. I read the book until the main character has gotten out of the rehabilitation center; but after that, it's all about her learning to accept her paralysis and find a husband, and that's boring; so I put it down.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - ichtms - 02-23-2007 08:19 PM

Biologically speaking I wasn't a child when this occured, but in the written product that came from this I used the sentence "the child is dead", in the meaning that I finally had lost all natural bonds with my self as a kid. A part in this process was me arriving by train to Vienna (capital of Austria), going to a stand where they sold danish pasteries, in Sweden these are called Wienerbröd, implying that it is a Bread from Vienna (don't remember if I knew that they were called danish pasteries back then), I bought one or two, I quickly concluded that something was wrong with the pasteries. Shortly I was leaving Vienna as I had previously left Antwerp in Belgium and was to leave West Berlin very soon... These events all took place over a period of three days, early july 1986, and I had just turned 21.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-25-2007 10:04 AM

Five years old. My family lived in a small mining town on the west coast of Tasmania (Population around 2000.)

I somehow got it into my head that I would take my one year old sister to the playground. So I did. We played around for a while and then I wanted to go home. So I said, "Let's go home." and my sister said, "DOH" (=No)

So I went home without her. Meanwhile my mum was frantically searching for my little sister when I got back. She said, "Where's your sister?"

My reply was - matter-of-factly - "At the playground."

My dad found little sister sitting by the slide and chewing the black gravel stones underneath.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Natalie - 02-25-2007 10:28 AM

Hahaha... You left the baby at the playground.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Pakrat - 02-25-2007 11:28 AM

When I was 5, Mum got my 2 younger brothers and me some flowers and water so we could make flower arrangements while she fed the baby. We were going alright for a while and then my 2 year old brother ate some of the flowers. In the meantime, I had caught a large Andrew's Cross spider in a jar and was really excited and ran in to tell mum.

When she came out to look, the spider was not in the jar and I was looking frantically all over the place for it. It was then that we noticed my 2 year old had a couple of spider legs hanging out of his mouth.

I was wailing "he ate my spiderrrrrrr!" and it took ages to console me. He only admitted to doing it a couple of years ago when he was in his late 30's.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 02-27-2007 11:40 PM

I just thought of another one today!  This happened when I was about 10 years old, during the school holidays.  My Mum took me out with a couple of school-friends.  They were my best friends at primary school.  We went to a local cafeteria for something to eat.

I've always been a very clumsy eater, particularly when I was younger, and at most mealtimes I spilt food down my chest.  At the cafeteria, I kept spilling food down my clothes even worse than usual.  I was laughing and my friends were laughing too.  My Mum then said, "Shall we buy her a bib?".  At first I thought she was joking.  She often used to say that.   But this time she wasn't joking at all.  She took us all to a kids' clothes shop and bought me a bib.  It was bright red, had a drip-catcher and looked really babyish - the sort of thing a 5 year old would wear.

When we got back to the cafeteria for desserts, my Mum put the bib on me, in front of my friends and the rest of the customers/staff.  I felt so embarrassed, and I started crying, begging her to let me take it off.  I can't remember much of what happened after that.

I asked my Mum about it a while ago.  She can still remember it, and she said that she did it to try and shock me into no longer spilling my food.  Until recently, I still had problems with spilling food, but luckily I was never made to wear the bib in public after the incident at the cafeteria - that was just a one off, although for a few days afterwards I did have to wear it at home when I was having dinner, but that wasn't quite so embarrassing.

When I look back at it now, it makes me laugh!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 02-28-2007 09:39 AM

Pakrat Wrote:

When she came out to look, the spider was not in the jar and I was looking frantically all over the place for it. It was then that we noticed my 2 year old had a couple of spider legs hanging out of his mouth.

Tongue Big Grin Tongue Tongue

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Ivar T - 02-28-2007 06:11 PM

I think I have talent for drawing. I can with some time draw what I see down on paper identically when it comes to lines.

Once at primary we were going to make a doll-theatre and we were to make the dolls of thick paper and sticks. For my group's doll-theatre there were several characters, one of them was some kind of fantasy horse.

One of the group's members was really into horses, she rode horses and liked to draw them, but she was sick that day. So I went to the school's library, gathered a book about hooved animals, drew a horse and added wings to it so that it looked like a pegasus. When the girl came back some few days later and she was a little sad because I was better at drawing horses than her.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Dragon - 03-01-2007 04:15 PM

I used to be extremely hyper when I was younger. I remember when we used to go to church, and we had to go in the other section by the entrance away from the main church bit (with the people and priests), and in this section there was a speaker so you could hear the priest talking. I basically just ran around and talked as usual, every now and then my mum would tell me to stand up or bow to the prayers etc.

At each mass, someone would ring the big church bell, and this one time, I must have been about 6, I tried to ring it myself. Usually it would be tied to a hook on the wall until the right time to ring it, but I almost managed to untie it and ring it right in the middle of the priest's sermon! My mum told me, looking really worried, that if I rang it it would make God angry, so I didn't ring it.

When the people came to ring the bell at the right time, I tried to stop them because I thought it would make God angry... Big Grin

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 05-10-2007 10:37 PM

I've just thought of some more stuff to add to this topic! Big Grin

When I was at high school, I was a member of the school choir. Therefore, I took part in the school concerts at the end of each term (also the school orchestra, soloists and other musicians from within the school could take part too). There was room for about 200-250 parents and teachers to watch.

One term, these 2 really awful rock bands, made up of senior students, each performed a song in the concert. The lead singer of one of the bands couldn't sing at all and he had a really squeaky voice. Everyone in the choir and orchestra kept laughing and sniggering throughout the song (even when we weren't performing, we still had to sit at the front of the hall, facing the audience). I couldn't stop laughing, but when I looked at the teachers and parents in the audience, they all had really straight faces - they didn't find it funny at all. For some reason, seeing the parents' and teachers' stern faces made me want to laugh even more. I was worried that the teachers were going to tell us all off after the concert for laughing at the rock bands, but luckily they never did. Big Grin

Another story - when I was 17 or 18, I was looking for a part-time/summer job, so I went down to my local JobCentre. They had touchscreen computers where you can search for jobs and print out descriptions/contact details of the ones you like. Then you had to take the printouts to an adviser who would phone the employers and ask them to mail you an application form.

One of the jobs said "Own transport required", but I liked the sound of it, so I printed it out anyway. The adviser looked at it and said, "Can you drive?". I replied, "No, but maybe if it's not too far to travel I could walk?" She then looked at me and said, "Well, it really does say you need your own transport" and before I could respond, she screwed up the printout and threw it in the bin. She then moved on to my next printout, which luckily didn't mention anything about transport.

Being very literal, I thought that walking was indeed a method of transport, and it didn't say on the printout precisely where the job was based, so for all the adviser knew, it could have been not far from my house anyway! Tongue

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 05-11-2007 07:02 AM

I reckon walking is a method of transport. (Job agents can be quite stupid)

When I was seven or so, I came home from school, and said to my mum, "I learnt a really rude word today. BOG!"

My mum said, "Yes, that isn't a very nice word, is it?"

Then I said, "And I know what it means too. It's when your car gets stuck in the mud and you can't get out!"

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Pakrat - 05-11-2007 01:59 PM

The same brother I talked about earlier who ate my spider also had some very interesting insults for people. One day he told my mum he would throw her "down the dunny can" because she did something that annoyed him.

The mind picture of a little 3 year old picking up a grown lady and throwing her in a can had me in hysterics!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - silky - 05-11-2007 02:37 PM

My mother often complained that she'd taking me shopping and show me dozens of "beautiful dolls" but I had no interest in them. When I got school age, the school had an order form with all sorts of really cool science toys. I went nuts begging my parents for the ant farm, the Visible Horse (you assembled the internal organs), gyroscopes and an electric motor you assembled yourself. After my parents gave me a microscope, I started bugging all their guests to let me take a sample of their blood for my slides.

My father got in trouble as a little altar boy because he corrected the priest's Latin.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - silky - 05-11-2007 03:04 PM

Mother was amused by my blunt statements at a baby shower. Everyone was making a huge fuss over some baby being passed around. When they showed it to me I shrugged and said quite sincerely, �If you�ve seen one baby, you�ve seen 'em all.� I watched silently while people went �oooh� and �ahhh� over a parade of cutesy gifts. At the end I observed, �Babies apparently require a large quantity of paraphernalia.� They seemed to think that was terribly funny.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 03-26-2008 08:19 PM

I've just remembered another funny thing which happened during my childhood.  Actually, it bewildered me for most of my childhood.

Every few weeks we used to go to the local fish and chip shop for our meal.  There was a sign on the wall near the counter saying: "Credit will only be given to people over 85 years of age - if accompanied by both parents."  Above the text was a cartoon-like picture of an elderly man flanked by his shrunken even-more-elderly parents!!

Every time we visited that fish and chip shop, I always used to be confused, as I took the sign literally.  Even though I was only young, I knew that for someone to live to 85 was in itself quite an achievement as the average life expectancy was about 70-something back then.  Then I would think to myself, "But surely even if someone did live to 85, it would be extremely unlikely that both their parents would still be alive.  If they were, they would both have to be well over 100.  And men usually die younger than women, so even if the mother was still alive, it would be very unlikely the father would still be here.  So how do they expect anyone to qualify for credit?"

I asked the other people in my family what the sign meant, but they didn't seem to know either.  It wasn't until I was older (ie in my teens) that I realised the sign must be a joke and should not be taken literally.  The owners of the shop probably thought it was a funny way to say that they're not willing to provide credit to anyone.

I don't think the sign is there any more though, as the shop was taken over by a new family several years ago.  However, it still makes me laugh to think that the sign confused me for all those years!! Big Grin

Has anyone else ever seen a sign like that?

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Zyggy - 03-26-2008 08:29 PM

I had a gang of parents in my school wanting me to be locked away for being dangerous.

Nuff said :p

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Zyggy - 03-26-2008 08:50 PM

Another thing.

When I was in year 11, I was an awesome discusser' athletically speaking.

I was practicing the discus out on the field, and the only place I could throw was near the track which was about 30 meters away, the PE guy said it was reasonable as 'I would never throw that"

Anyway he starts sending people running around and I throw my discuss determined to prove him wrong and it lands right in front of people on the track, 31.7 meters from where I was standing.

When he came over and had a go at me about how I could have killed someone.

"I cant help it if I am better than you"

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 03-26-2008 10:08 PM

Yet another thing.

When I was about 3 years old, my playgroup/nursery organised a trip to one of the local parks for all the children and their parents. At the park there was a big paddling pool (it was built into the ground, not one of those inflatable ones). I was sitting with my Mum by the side of the pool, when all of a sudden 3 young boys dashed across the pool, completely naked! I'd never seen a naked boy before, so I asked my Mum "Why have they all got little sticks near their bum bums?!" My Mum was really embarrassed and I think a lot of the other mothers laughed too.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - nyanchan - 03-27-2008 01:23 AM

silky Wrote:

My father got in trouble as a little altar boy because he corrected the priest's Latin.

hehe. Before, after, or during the service?

Truthfully, I never had much interest in dolls as a kid either. Or flowers. Still don't.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Sparkle1984 - 05-05-2011 10:53 PM

I know I'm digging up a really old thread, but I've just remembered another funny story from when I was younger.  The memory of it was triggered by a weird dream I had this morning - I dreamt that there was a baby in our house and it was sitting on our sofa.  I have no idea who the baby was, but it reminded me of a funny true story from when I was 14 years old.

My sister and 2 nieces came round to our house one evening.  At the time, the younger niece was just a few months old, and the older one was 4 years old.  When I was younger, I had a strange phobia about calling people by their names, so I used to do anything to avoid it, including making up silly nicknames for people and using long-winded descriptions to describe the person I was talking about.

Anyway, when I was talking to my sister, I referred to my nieces as "the babies".  My sister told me off for that, and she said that I should refer to them by their real names, or even call them "the children/kids".  I replied that I called them "the babies" because it's easier than saying both of their names.  As I was still a child myself at the time, it would've felt strange calling them "the children".  Afterwards, I felt a bit silly and I didn't understand why my sister was making it into such a big deal.

However, now I'm at the grand old age of 27, and I look back at this funny incident, I can definitely understand why my sister found it strange that I should refer to my 4 year old niece as a baby!  Looking back, I can see that calling a 4 year old a baby is really stretching the definition of the word "baby" to the limit! After all, she was old enough to be at primary school!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Some_Bloke - 05-05-2011 11:01 PM

I got into a little adventure, when my sister tried to steal a duck from the farmer. He said in the funniest voice possible [high pitched, with a farmer accent added.] "Step away from the duck."
oviousley not aspie related...

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - black butterfly - 05-06-2011 12:14 AM

well, there is that time when i decided to ride a small tricyle down an inflatable slide when i was five...

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Some_Bloke - 05-06-2011 06:29 PM

Yet again not aspie related, a primary school friend of mine invented a new kind of game, you had to go down a slide on a skateboard, sitting down cuz it was impossible to stay on, all of us were able to stay on, but not him, he fell off sometimes deliberate, others he actually fell. He tried to go on it standing up and well you have to figure out what happens next.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Some_Bloke - 05-06-2011 09:39 PM

When i was in playgroup, we had a stranger awareness day. A friend's mum [the same who invented the skateboard game] was due to pick me up, she took my hand and i yelled "No, your a stranger!" [we had been advised to yell and i still laugh at it even now]

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - 142857 - 05-06-2011 11:51 PM

^ Once when I was a teenager a little girl randomly asked me (in a friendly voice) if I was a stranger. I said "yes" and she screamed. I ran away.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Vampslord - 05-07-2011 07:02 AM

When i was 3 my mom use to tell me boggeyman story to get me to take nap. Only she wascalling it bad man. So one day she was hidding under her bed sheet telling me to come to bed quick before the bad man get here, and how she was scared. So i told her to wait a minute. I ran downstairs, grab a huge carving knife and the roast fork. Then i went up, sit on the bed and told my mom not to worry, i had the situation in hand and if the bad men came, i will just cut them into piece and that she could go back to sleep while i stood guard over her.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - peyes - 11-13-2012 05:05 PM

Sparkle1984 Wrote:

When I was about 6 or 7 years old, I asked my sister what caused thunder.  She told me that thunder is caused by clouds banging together!!  The scary thing is, I actually believed her for several years!!  It was only when we studied weather in science that I realised her explanation didn't make sense.

Another story:  When I was about 14, my Dad bought our first Windows computer with AOLinternet connection.  In those days, with AOL you could have up to 5 separate screen-names per account.  When I was in a chatroom one day, I saw that someone had the screenname Sweetie.  I decided that I liked the sound of that name because it reminded me of sweets/candy, so I set myself up the screenname Sweetee.  I didn't realise that the name has a second meaning!  Everytime I logged on, I was bombarded with instant messages from strange boys/men wanting to chat to me.  My Dad asked me why I had chosen the screenname Sweetee, and I said it was because I like sweets!  In the end, I had to block all incoming instant messages, because I didn't want to have to change my screenname.

We don't use AOL anymore though.  Once I reached the age of 17 or 18, I began to find the whole thing rather irritating.

I was a big fan of BSB, I was crazy about them that I knew every single thing about each member of the group! once I read an interview on one of the fan websites about AJ, he was asked about his favorite number, and his answer was 69! I was only a little child that I didn't know anything about it. when I wanted to create my first yahoo id I put this number at the end of my id! I had the same problem as you in the chat rooms Tongue I had to block every inappropriate message! when later, after some years, I found out what the meaning of that number was I deleted my account!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - AspieMomma - 11-14-2012 02:48 AM

A moose bit my sister once....oh, wait, you mean my childhood.

My brother and I were particularly goofy kids.  We made a lot of mischief.

He was bothering me one day, so I explained to him that if he did not cease to be a nuisance immediately I would have no choice but to shove a lego up his nose.

He continued to pester me, so I followed through.

When my mother asked me why I would do such a thing, I explained that he had received a warning, so I should not be help accountable.

Well, after about 20 minutes, a lot of laughing, a lot of yelling, and a now ruined pair of tweezers that finally dislodged the lego, my mother did not agree!

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Chamuel - 11-14-2012 08:19 AM

I had a friend - my friend was a stone called Issac. I loved Issac.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Some_Bloke - 11-14-2012 08:40 PM

Technically not childhood, but...

When I was around 13 a friend's little brother asked me where babies came from. We were walking, so I stopped, turned to him and said.

"Don't be so silly, Oliver. We all know that babies grow on trees."

This was followed by a half hour conversation as to how this worked...

It worked like this:

Trees with blue leaves: Boys
Trees with pink leaves: girls
Trees with multicolored leaves: Unknown

Anyway, when the parents are about to have a baby they are taken to "secret gardens" in these gardens are the trees. It's free unless you want to pick from the blue or pink trees as they are not as common. They choose a leaf, which is then swallowed or something by the mother and this is how she gets pregnant.

To answer any further questions I then told him that he was from a blue leaf and I was multicolored, his older brother was also blue.

RE: Amusing anecdotes from your childhood - Captain Jigglypuff - 11-16-2012 10:21 PM

This one is sort of cute in a sort of twisted way. From the first time I saw bambi and I was four until I was about eight, I had no idea Littlefoot and Bambi's moms were dead. I thought in each case, the mother decided to leave her child and move away without them. I didn't even know what a gun was until I was eight and that they could kill people if they were shot. So I never went through the "Bambi stage" kids are supposed to go through after watching the movie. I would also run away once a week and always ended up at the neighbor's house. I don't know why, but that's where I'd run away to.