Hello people!
I'm new to this site, apologies if I'm asking something already covered...
My girlfriend has a 7 year old sister with Aspergers. I know a reasonable amount, as I have had a friend online for the last seven or so years with the condition who has helped me no end in understanding it! I understand that obsessive behaviour can be seen in children...
... in this particular case, the girl is obsessed with Daleks! She makes them from bits and bobs and all the rest of it. But her sister (my gf) is worried that this obsession will lead to her not having anything in life to "fall back on", to actually do and like as far as jobs and such.
To this end, she was wondering how you would encourage the Aspie (I understand this is the colloquial, non-offensive term to use?) to take up other hobbies. She does/did like horses, but when taken horse riding seemed to not do as she was told.
Any suggestions would be greatfully received! Many thanks!
Wulfy.
My girlfriend has a 7 year old sister with Aspergers. I understand that obsessive behaviour can be seen in children...
... in this particular case, the girl is obsessed with Daleks! She makes them from bits and bobs and all the rest of it. But her sister (my gf) is worried that this obsession will lead to her not having anything in life to "fall back on", to actually do and like as far as jobs and such.
To this end, she was wondering how you would encourage the Aspie (I understand this is the colloquial, non-offensive term to use?) to take up other hobbies. She does/did like horses, but when taken horse riding seemed to not do as she was told.
Any suggestions would be greatfully received! Many thanks!
Wulfy
Okay, she is 7 years old... and making Daleks? Good for her.. I had to look up what they were 
Again, she is 7. I am not sure one has to worry too much yet about a a job or that this particular obsession will lead to her not having anything else to fall back on.
Perhaps ask the girl herself what she would like to do for a hobby?
What do you mean " she seemed to not do as she was told?"
Welcome to the forum, Wulfy..
The single best piece of advice I could give you is: Let her carry on with it!
Maybe she'll grow up to be a robotics engineer, or an artist.
Even if she doesn't, trust me on this: the last thing she needs is for anyone to inadvertently make her feel like her special interests are "weird" or "wrong". That could be very bad for both her self-esteem and her relationship with her mom and you.
... in this particular case, the girl is obsessed with Daleks! She makes them from bits and bobs and all the rest of it. But her sister (my gf) is worried that this obsession will lead to her not having anything in life to "fall back on", to actually do and like as far as jobs and such.
That's so cool!
There is a chance her obsession won't carry through to adulthood, anyway.
But my understanding is, in learning about Daleks and making Daleks, she is still learning useful art and construction skills, as well as getting joy out of something she loves.
(As an example, they say that the majority of elite physicists were / are Trekkies.)
And at seven, I wouldn't worry too much about "fall back" positions. It's not like she's in high school or anything.
Perhaps encourage some variety of interests, but don't be too worried if she doesn't take to any of these.
Many thanks for your swifty replies. I shall pass this information on and no doubt will be back when I need more advice!
I agree with the other posters. So, she is obsessed with daleks instead of barbie dolls. She is only 7. How many people do you know that chose (or trained for) a career at 7 yrs old and ended up having a career doing that when they grew up? At that age a lot of NT little girls are only planning a career of "fairy princess".
I agree with the other posters. So, she is obsessed with daleks instead of barbie dolls. She is only 7. How many people do you know that chose (or trained for) a career at 7 yrs old and ended up having a career doing that when they grew up? At that age a lot of NT little girls are only planning a career of "fairy princess".
I think the thing my girlfriend worries about is the fact that school work for example interests her very little (and yes, I understand that applies to NT kids too). She struggles in Maths particularly (my forté it has to be said).
Leads me to another question... her parents can be very intolerant of her not grasping these things. And my GF asked me if I could help teach her Maths when she's doing homework... is there anything anyone could suggest to aid me? Other than not losing your temper as that's hideously counter productive!
Cheers.
Wulfy,
Dalek's as in Dr. Who?
Let her have her obsession. I think to try to take it away will only make it more pronounced in any case... not to mention making her very sad.
And in answer to the question, what do you do about or with it - you use it, of course.
True story:
A friend's passion was Wizard of Oz as a child.
He once told me he had difficulty grasping certain math skills when younger, for him it was counting in 5's and 10's, you know where they teach you with pictures of bunched up pencils . He said if someone had taught it to him by grouping the yellow bricks from the yellow brick road instead he'd have had no problem with it. That always stuck with me. By the way that individual went on to become a writer, among other things. He even authored 3 books on Wizard of Oz Collectibles.
Given her passion and just off the top of my head, she may grow up to be a an artist, movie prop designer, or an ME who designs machinery or robotics. She's doing just fine... what would help her though is if you guys would expand your thinking a bit on ways to use here passions to help her in areas where she has difficulty making the connection.
Best of Luck. Mom of Hrick
I think Daleks are so cool too. I also think let this young girl stay interested in her Daleks and let her be a child without pressuring her to be good at school.
If she is anything like most of us, she will hate being pushed to do things so it will be very counterproductive to force her to do things before she is ready. I don't think she is the one with the problem but her parents might have some issues eg. intolerance, which they need to sort out.
my GF asked me if I could help teach her Maths when she's doing homework... is there anything anyone could suggest to aid me?
Some folks on the spectrum seem to do better with visual examples, props and visual illustrations rather than just abstract formulas.
Perhaps you can find some way to incorporate her favorite hobby into some math problems. I don't know if that will side track things but you could try it.
My girlfriend has a 7 year old sister with Aspergers. I understand that obsessive behaviour can be seen in children...
... in this particular case, the girl is obsessed with Daleks! She makes them from bits and bobs and all the rest of it. But her sister (my gf) is worried that this obsession will lead to her not having anything in life to "fall back on", to actually do and like as far as jobs and such.
To this end, she was wondering how you would encourage the Aspie (I understand this is the colloquial, non-offensive term to use?) to take up other hobbies. She does/did like horses, but when taken horse riding seemed to not do as she was told.
Okay, she is 7 years old... and making Daleks? Good for her.. I had to look up what they were
Of course an obsession with Daleks can lead to a career! She could design stage props, or study aliens, or learn Science and you could help her by relating it to all things Doctor Who.
Lol, I have NO CLUE what Daleks are, except what I've read here.
When it comes to homework, that is a HUGE struggle with my AS son. If it is easy he fails to see the point of it. If it is difficult, he is frustrated and giving up before he has even started. Long run, he has to internalize the reasons for getting it done on his own. There isn't much we can do to force it.
Rewards and deterents from the teacher at school work help quite a bit. They are, of course, the same for the whole class. If my son knows that not getting his homework done means losing a recess he wants, well, he is more likely to get it done. And so on.
One thing that helps is breaking it up. My son seems to find the full of sheet of math problems, for example, overwhelming. Never mind that he is a superstar at math, it is sitting down to write out the solutions to all those equations that freaks him out. So, we'll offer that if he does say 2 problems he will get a break or reward. We've played all sorts of silly games. Sometimes I've even acted out the homework for his reward. We also have permission from the teacher to set a time limit. If he has worked hard for a certain amount of time, we sign the full homework off as done, even if it isn't. My son works much slower than the other kids, since this accomodation helps a lot. I also will write some of his assignments for him, although I limit this to no more than one a week. It is amazing how much he enjoys homework if the pen has left his hand!
Basically a good place to start is to figure out WHAT it is about the item of homework that is causing stress, and then see if anything can be done to change that item.
I was obsessively interested in sharks and dinosaures at that age.
After a few years I switched to electronics and later also computers.
So I never became an archeologist or a biologist.
Like all the others said before, there's really no reson to try changing her field of interests.
Changing this by force will never lead to an improvement in her math-skills-the opposite is right.
I think daleks are really cool.
Would be glad, if you could post some of her works here
Maybe you could do examples such as: "if you have three daleks and somebody gives you three more, how many daleks do you have now?".
Daleks also have a pattern of buttons on their bodies and that could be used perhaps as an aid in teaching times tables.
It's a dilema. I know myself how my own interests can grab me, but when I look at my eldest (aspie) I wanted her to get good marks at school too. Aspies seem to have radically different learning mechanisms from NT kids. They suit the Steiner schooling method better, as this method of education allows them to use their own innate style of learning and yet still recieve a well rounded education. If there are any Steiner type schools in your area, your gf's sister might find it a good environment to make the most of her educational years.
All the best.