Aspies For Freedom

There was this other kid in my class at school. He would at every possible occasion say "You suck", "You're ***" and something about my behavior like "you walk funny". At first I would attack him physically whenever he did. Then the teacher said that attacking back was just as wrong, and that physical attacks are even worse than verbal. (I were only able to make a sufficient attack physically, as many other autistic). So then I just had to listen to this brat wherever I went. I once said to him "You're bullying me", he repeated "No, you're bullying me".

I don't really know. My relationship to this guy was more complex than that.

I was under the impression it was children with conduct disorder or ODD, whether or not combined with AS and/or ADHD, who tended to act this way?

Not intentionally maybe - but my older daughter (As) reacts pretty sharply to my younger NT (mostly) daughter if she's engaging in behaviour that she (the elder one) thinks might overload her.

At the same time my elder daughter can be ver protective and the younger one can also be protective and she is very assertive in trying to organise the adults around her.

I think it may be as hard for an NT person to fit into an AS family as vice versa, and I try and allow for that and teach both daughters tolerance.

I think aspies can easily misinterpret things and feel an hostile atmosphere, which they respond to by attacking back, verbally or physically (they can both be damaging).

Here's a chat I noticed a couple of days ago. I think both seven and Amy perceive eachother as bullies. I think both could have acted differently and not caused the fight that continued. Unfortunately to act differently is an unatural thing to do for any person if they feel an hostile atmosphere.

(NTPARENT is Amy and aspietofree is seven)

<aspietofree> REAL auistics need to be cured, spies are cool.
<codeman38> (...not just sadly real, but from Autism Speaks, no less. sigh.)
*** SONOFAMOM is now known as Nate
<Gareth> aspietofree: are you trying tp parody us now?
<Gareth> *to
<aspietofree> im trying to parody the really dumb aspies iive met.
<aspietofree> like "omg how cn you be anti cure? real autsitcis need cures!"
<Gareth> i really hope we're not going to get another droopy here
*** aspietofree is now known as seven
<seven> i was yelled at for syaing cure groups are bad :p by aspies.
<seven> they said "REAL autistics' need a cure.
<Gareth> "how dare you say you've been bullied - aspies never get bullied, only LFAs"
<seven> and iened to be SENSATIVE to their eneds
<NTPARENT> but seven you are self dx anyway
<seven> how dare i not be SENSATIVE to lfas needs of a cure
<codeman38> um. dude. have these people who talk about 'REAL autistics' ever seen ballastexistenz's youtube videos? >_<
<Prince_Anthony> What idiots.
<seven> amy : so what? half teh peopel here are too.
<Prince_Anthony> I'm going to go now.
<NTPARENT> seven because you keep making a difference on the diagnosis/spectrum while others dont
<Gareth> i used to refer to LFAs needing a "cure" to bring them up to HFA level, chose a bad choice of words
*** Prince_Anthony has quit (Quit: Leaving.)
<seven> code : teh peopel who talk about "real autistics' are very sheltered aspies with phsyco NT parents
<Nate> what is a diagnosis: an expensive word of an opinion from a doctor
<seven> no garteh thats not what they were sayng :s
<Gareth> i know seven
* mel raises hands at pyshco NT parents
<Gilliatt> lol
* Nate beats psycho NT parents ***
* seven has very non-nt parents
<codeman38> oh, and on the hexadecimal number thing... believe it or not, Java bytecode files begin with 0xCAFEBABE.
<mel> my whole family is NT :-/
<seven> amy : yes, people do.
<Gareth> codeman38: seriously?
<mel> brb getting a cuppa
<cousin_luigi> yes
*** mel has quit (Quit: OUCH!!!)
<codeman38> Seriously. Open a .class file in a hex editor if you don't believe it.
<seven> you JUST made fun of NTs, and you complain about me distinguishing kanners from aspergers?
<NTPARENT> when people self dx they dont place themselves precisely on a specific point on the spectrum, a doctor would find that hard
<seven> im sorry but that is hypocritical
<NTPARENT> no its not
<seven> how isnt it?
<Gareth> wow
<Gareth> you're right
<cousin_luigi> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_number_(programming)
<seven> whos right?
<NTPARENT> ok you have started on me now seven
<seven> and yes amy, alot of them do.
<NTPARENT> remember that
<NTPARENT> when you cry later
<seven> jeeze ijust asked how its differnet when you tell me notto and ten you do something similar
<seven> i dindt "starton you" im not trying to attack you
<NTPARENT> no you just called me a hypocrite

I guess it would take some effort.

"and iened to be SENSATIVE to their eneds "

Probably means:

And I need to be sensitive to their needs

I am an only child so this impression might be off, but I have noticed that it seems to be quite "normal" to fight quite a lot among siblings. My partner once got whacked on the head with a heavy shoe by his sister, my Dad got shot in the neck with an air rifle by his brother (that was an accident though... I hope!) and so on.

I have to admit that I bully my cat, I tease him alot, and I am not proud of it.

That's what bullying is about, someone has low self esteem and tries to make themselves feel important/strong etc. by bullying those who are weaker.

I agree, it would be - however even with narcissism there is a strong issue of low self esteem, even if the person wouldn't ever admit these feelings about themselves.

Oh, ignore my post before this one in that case! I see you've already posted what I wanted to say more eloquently than I had anyway! And yes from what I have read about NPD what you wrote above is 100% correct.

Think there's a major difference between being rude towards people and bully. Some people dislike the rude stuff more than others, and then the bully use that to tease.

Who wrote anything about excuses? I believe it has been stated many times on here that low self esteem is no excuse for bullying behaviour!

That atitude makes YOU the bully, IMHO

Nah, DogBrain is just abit idealistic and asks for things that seems impossible at this date.

Bullying should indeed be more punished.

Completely agree there - I just draw the line at incitement to "diminish people's confidence" and suchlike.

You know that's not true - at least going by your posts (I don't know you in real life after all) you are very intelligent indeed. Just because I sometimes disagree with you doesn't make you unintelligent - people's opinions have nothing to do with intelligence