I dunno if this is the case for everyone with As but for me I can't be mad that long. Infact it took me a while to understand why everyone around me would stay mad much longer then me, I usually get over the signifigant brunt in 10 minutes or something and then feel mostly or all better, but people around could stay made for hours and even days and weeks, or beyond.
My step mom abused me, whooped me with a belt and never called me by my name but instead called me dumbass, like "Hey, dumbass go get me a coke." And all it did was was make my self asteem go way down and me think of myself as lesser, but I never could hold a grudge. Even now I can't, I just hope she can go through some kind of situation to change her ways, especially for her grandchildren's sake.
As far as my experince though its impossible for me to hold a grudge, I just cant be mad long enough, actually I got in trouble sometimes because I could be fine and even laugh at something very shortly after being angery but the people around me were still mad and thought I was being a smartass.
Actually I cant count the times I've been accused of being a smartass or playing dumb, knowing exactly what im doing, or being a know it all. So annoying, the whole time I was growing up, it was so annoying because no one ever seemed to pay attention to me and just discounted alot of things as me being a smartass or a know it all or whatever.
Thank god now that I'm an adult at least my parents dont discount what I say like they used to, though, in my dads case, anyway, hes changed too, my stepmom stole his money and kicked him out and stuff and I think that changed him some so one way or another hes nicer in general and nicer to me. I still dont completely understand some of those emotions though that people go through.
Anyway, in all this ambling, my whole point was, is it even possible for an Aspie(without any other condition) to even stay mad enough long enough, to even get anywhere near this point of action? For me I know it would be impossible, but I don't know if its like that for everyaspie.
I don't agree, I have held "mild grudges" toward certain people for years at a time, and I tend to be a generally angry/envious person.
But I wouldn't be able to get to any "breaking point" that would include horrible things. Instead I use creative endeavors as an outlet for the continual anger/envy problem I have.
I certainly have some bitterness in me, and I'm sure a lot of Aspies both on AFF and not, also have some bitterness. A lot of us have been bullied and "left out" in our time, and often that tends to make a person bitter and distrustful of others. And so we make it a habit to limit our interaction within the ubiquitous NT herd, because this is often a troubling, confusing, "better-than-thou" world and we don't like feeling marginalized or insignificant... many NTs make us feel "left out" and it's not a pleasant feeling for us. So we prefer our own company a bit more than "competing" in the herd... and I don't see anything wrong with this. It's a preference for many Aspies--not a sickness, by any measure.
And to boot, there's a not-so-subtle line between naturally occurring, internal human anger and the ability to commit horrible acts against innocent people. I happen to have a good heart, and most everyone who ever interacts with me knows this automatically. I suppose I'm a "loner" in general, I don't like being in groups of people and so on, but one on one with those I know well, I'm quite a "beautiful mind."
