Aspies For Freedom

tell me more.

may i ask what the setting is, when this occures?

It should not be about separate groups saying understand me, it should be everyone trying to understand everyone whether they are NT, borderline, aspie, HFA, LFA or something else entirely. We should all be trying to be more tolerant, more forgiving and more accepting and allow people to just be who they are (excluding physical abuse or intentional mental harm).

I don't actually feel that NTs understand and empathise as much as they think they do, they ONLY think how they would feel and because most NTs react the same way they think they are putting themselves in someone elses shoes. Little things they say to people on the autie spectrum that they wouldn't find offensive can be deeply upsetting to someone on the autism spectrum either because its said in a way they can't understand it or because its actually not accurate.

For people anywhere on the autistic spectrum we have such a different way of thinking so even if I was with someone who thought exactly the same way as me we may still come up with different perspectives to the same question or situation. This is particularly true if we have been constantly told that was mean, rude, offensive, lecturing and we didn't think how the other person would feel, most of us have actually learnt to look for more than one answer.

Sorry don't think I'm explaining too well. I know what I mean in my head.

hmm. seven i researched Autism a year ago for school and i found the first  paragraph of it.i would like to see if i discribed it right.may i pm it to you?

seven,
i know it not condition but it was the 'nicest' word i could come up with at the time that wouldnt be corrected by my teacher.She was a stickler for relevence.i would have prefed to use words semlar to what you wrote but the medical commuty still veiws it as a 'condition'.
respeacfully yours,
Guardian

the others i had to choose from were disorder-hate it, diesese- in accurate, and illness-way inaccrate.

quite true.

and what kind of tree it is.

well, seven. do you feel a little better ,now? i have a friend her name sarah, shes autisic like you,i think. she doesnt talk much but i like listen to her talk.(poor spelling skills) i have statement make to your black and white comment, for me the world is mostly black or white:yes or no.but i'm learning maybe:grey.
i like to read what you have to say,too. it turns heads, very informative.

ive been around LFA and i dont have any problems with communication, nor do i think they do.
i feel better around LFA cos i dont need to use words to communicate, i can communicate in my natural language which is though experience.

i love to play with the guys, laugh and just enjoy life with them.
just sitting around and enjoying visual stimuli is fun aswell.

at times i try to teach them to associate objects and situations with words, and i can clearly see that they remember the queues, its like building up a language from scratch.

the odd thing though is apart from individual symbols, the natural language is something almost every authie ive met enjoys and understands.
seems to remove some of the anxiousness.
remember they have to try and fit the NT world just as we do.
they like it when someone walks over to their side, just as we do when a NT tried to get into our world and learns to communicate with us.

i feel sad that seven has only had bad experiences, but i understand him very well, many of the aspies ive met i do not connect with, i feel that they tend to be more selfish then authies but again its not a law, some are more some are less. just as everybody else.

seven, i hope you stick around here, or atleast dont go away and feel that nobody understands you.
that would be a shame, atleast from my perspective.

Yeah, that's what I was getting at.  Thanks for backing me up.

That's an interesting point, I wonder if my inability to process information in an integrated manner (the way those without AS/autism do) is what makes it seem like I have ADD--I get lots of information at once but can't "shut off" the less important information.

So in order to focus properly, I have to get into hyperfocus on one thing... and that's the only way to "block out" everything else.

But then again I am told that those with only ADD/ADHD also get into hyperfocus, so this is confusing.

So just because you think I'm childish I "automatically" can't argue certain points very well, and therefore I lose my validity and I may as well be dismissed on points that "only mature adults" comprehend.

Anyhow, I was saying I take offense at somebody generalizing male Aspies as "mostly immature and/or unwilling to speak for themselves in social situations."  While some of this may hold water, I have a problem with the word "immature"... it's a hurtful label in many cases.  It is often used to make someone feel bad about themselves in hope that the person makes changes in his/her life that would be considered "beneficial" by the accuser.

I don't see why "not agreeing" to make certain changes isautomatically considered immature and "wrong in every instance."  That is an NT way of looking at things and that is why I feel many Aspies, generally, don't benefit much from conventional therapy/self-help wisdom and so on.

The narcissistic jocks I knew from high school were very "masculine" and seen as "mature" and yet they refused to let down their ego for even one second.  All the girls were interested in them, and yet I had hardly ever observed more obnoxious, arrogant individuals than them.  Putting everyone seen as "inferior" down, to help themselves feel "superior."