Aspies For Freedom

Im diagnosed with OCD, ADD / ADHD, sensory problems, social anxiety disorder / agoraphobia. I was diagnosed seperately (at different times over a period of 3 years from the same doctor. I never really gave all my info and feelings at once it always felt a bit strange talking about some things even when i was really depressed.

I accepted i had ocd and other problems untill somebody mentioned aspergers and autism spectrum disorders to me online. I had never heard of it before and was quiet suprised. For a while i was quiet sociable at school (part of highschool) though i got in bad situations i didnt quiet understand (what teenager hasnt?) well once i started reading about it i was really scared, suprised, and nervous.

I cant list all of my symptoms because it would take up quiet a few pages. That stuborness once i become fixed on something, some delay in speach (towards end of being 3 before i was able to do more then repeat) and even then my mom was confused because i didnt seem to want to talk - i would get angry when they tried to get me to talk. I didnt do well in school and got in a lot of trouble quiet often for not understanding when i couldnt do this or that (led to lots of problems).
Change was another problem that has seemed unsurmountable. Vacations, class changes, moving - anything really. I had been progressing a big recently then found out parents are getting a devorce and one is moving to the other side of the country and i dont know where i will live which has led to me taking about 10 steps back.

I want to be "normal" in some ways. I want to work i want to have my own house but the idea of working, of going out and carying out those types of daily tasks around all of those srangers numbs my mind. I just dont understand it, how to do it, how to have a changing schedual (which throws me off in a big way).

Now that im 21 i have decided to get help. when i turned 18, 19, and 20 i made excuses but it become moer and more obvious once i tried to leave the house that something was wrong. I did ok when i had parents taking care of things for me but once i tried to do it... it became obvious something was wrong or "different". My mom knew from the moment i started to speak (what little i did). Then with how strange i behaved. She realized after years of trying to get me to act "normal" that i just wasnt that way and let me find my own path (within reason).

Well now i have doctors telling me that i have many of the same traits etc. but its not clear what i have or dont have. THat there is no way for me to know which is very hard for me to accept because i need some type of answer (the truth). How can i find out? Is there no way? Do i go to a new psychologist and start over so that they dont have any preconceived notions of whats wrong with me? One big issue is i have a very strong sense of sympathy and empathy. In fact it is far beyond normal when i see some one else in pain its like i have a receiver in my brain and they trainsmit everything there feeling to me.
That been said before i became obsessive about being nice i didnt really understand or think about it when it came to me being sympathetic to others (for what i had done to them).
I keep hearing if i had problems with that to it would be obvious that was the case but not so for me.

Any ideas? Everytime i take one of those aspie quizes i always score very high into the aspie spectrum.

I am sorry I can offer valueless advice and opinion, but you have my support. I hope someone else can do better for you than me.

Your idea of finding a new psychologist so that they don't have preconceptions seems valid to me. If you are unhappy with what has been offered to you so far, it seems logical to hit the refresh button. Even if you can only blurt out what you think and then have to sit through someone else's opinions, you will at least have someone who is looking at you from new eyes, and who doesn't have their own vested emotional/egoistic interest to protect (What me, wrong? Never! - That sort of thing) in relation to your case.
I have no experience in this sort of thing- but there is little to lose from seeing someone new, unless you have invested enough time, effort and trust in your current psychologist to take what they say as correct. And it sounds like you don't.

Once again, I have to say that this is nothing more than opinion.

yea that was my view on it to. i have seen a few different people over past few years and one of the few said he always suspected that could be an aspect to why i had such a hard time. Psychiatrist doesnt really wan to hear much about it though i dont think.

at this point it might be hard to get AS diagnoses anyways and im not to concerned about getting it. I just want the truth reguardless of what that means.

I have been trying to fit in for so many years - trying to seem normal for so long all of the traits that would seem obvious have all but vanished except for the habits / reutines and repetitive motions / noises with throat. When i was younger i used to sit in my closet for hours making buildings with k'nex, designing castles and other entresting things. Teachers and kids used to ask what was wrong with me and my parents finnaly took me to family doctor and he said ADHD (heres ritalin). With almost every school i went to i was almost always kicked out, one teacher tried constnatly to convince principal to expell me but mom talked them out of it. Almost all said i had to be on meds otherwise they wouldnt let me stay.

I have thought about vocational rehab but im concerned about having to talk about certain things i dont really want to talk about that may be relevant (addiction problems). Right now im able to handle 1 class at college and im going to try 2 next semester. To much and i cant handle it, to confusing having things pull me in different directions.

at this point it might be hard to get AS diagnoses anyways and im not to concerned about getting it. I just want the truth reguardless of what that means.

I have been trying to fit in for so many years - trying to seem normal for so long all of the traits that would seem obvious have all but vanished except for the habits / reutines and repetitive motions / noises with throat. When i was younger i used to sit in my closet for hours making buildings with k'nex, designing castles and other entresting things. Teachers and kids used to ask what was wrong with me and my parents finnaly took me to family doctor and he said ADHD (heres ritalin). With almost every school i went to i was almost always kicked out, one teacher tried constnatly to convince principal to expell me but mom talked them out of it. Almost all said i had to be on meds otherwise they wouldnt let me stay.

I have thought about vocational rehab but im concerned about having to talk about certain things i dont really want to talk about that may be relevant (addiction problems). Right now im able to handle 1 class at college and im going to try 2 next semester. To much and i cant handle it, to confusing having things pull me in different directions.