have any of you been mute, or are mute?
how did it work out? or how do you Make it work? etc.
i hate speaking and ive been mute off and on when i was younger,i wana be mute for the most part again. im going to be mute this weekend at an anime con i am attending, but im actually participating in a number of activities, and im on staff, so i do not know how well it will work out.
Hi, Seven,
When you go "mute," do you selectively go mute, or do you feel it come on?
I have only had a few episodes of going mute. Once, I was talking to someone about a job project, and in the middle of a sentence, I went blank, and it was as if someone had pushed a button, and I forgot how to talk. I kind of snickered, without sound, wrote a note to the person I was talking to that I needed a break, and left the office. I regained the ability to speak after a short while (half hour or so), but it was difficult to formulate sentences for a few days, and I was more functional when I didn't have to talk (I was a publicity and marketing director at a radio station--I had lots of graphic projects, so I could work on those, or write copy).
The other incidents were similar.
What brings you to the point of being mute?
I find this fascinating, and I know there are others here who have experienced more than I have, and will post.
I hope you have fun at the convention--which one are you going to?
Metta, Jaye.
I've often wanted to stop speaking. I tried it a few times when I was young and I just got myself in a heap of trouble. It made my parents terribly angry, and it wasn't worth their wrath.
nyanchan is EXACTLY like me.
yes i sometimes go selectivley mute (chose to stop ttalking becuase ive been pushed so far into frustration that im isck of dealing with it) and sometimes i just go totally blank void of words without wanting to. ALWAYS if i am too upset or excited, i cannot form words or read, for example.
I remember being 'mute' at school for almost the entire 1st year and a lot of junior school. I was often alone in the playground and I would avoid being seen alone, i did not speak to anyone of my peer group because it was like I did not know how to. I spent a lot of time in the libary reading and got to know the sweet librian more than my class mates. I was mortified when they would not let me in the libary (I think they must have figured why I did and sent me out there like a lamb to the slaughter - I hide from the other kids, sort of pretending that they would not notice I was alone - I remember hating it especially when it was cold and raining). I was puzzled why my classmates from junior school no longer spoke to me even my cousin!. I was embarassed for being alone. I remember one day a girl spoke to me and it opened up a social world for me. She became my only friend at that time and my first true friend. I hung out with her all that summer with her and her brother it was fun.
later on I made another friend and I used to hang out with her and lots of other older teenagers. I remember being mute for hours in these large groups it was like I had lost the ability to talk. Sometimes people would take the pxxs and I would stop talking, like it knocked my confidence.
As an adult I have often been mute when out with colleagues from work in noisy places, particularly before I have had a drink or cannot drink for whatever reason. In these situations I had sensory overload I could not follow conversations. I smoke and/or a drink would sort that out. Overtimes I have been disturbed and distressed retreated into my own world not wanting anyone to know there was a problem. On one such occassion I was happy chatting away, then someone said something that upset me, hurt me, confused me and quite frankly pxxsed me off. I went quite focused on smoking a tone of weed and drank a fair bit, then I started laughing and went into an hillarious monalogue (nervousness tic?). Having previously had a hard time in my life one person said he was so glad to see me happy, I thought I am miserable and upset huh? I remember being knocked back from the pub we went to go in, I remember my friend saying she has not drank anymore than anyone else and someone else said they do not know that she always looks drunk (poor eye contact etc).
More recently I become quite when cabbaged (kind of catatonic) by anxiety triggered by sensory overload or when I am depressed.
That period of 'muteness' affected me so much that I was scared to be on my own in public places, like I was self conscious that people would think I was a loner. The afternoon after the pychologist told me she thought I was Asperger's I arrived an hour early at a restaurant where I was meeting my friends. I went in got a drink and waited listening to my cd walkman and reading Tim Burton book. The waitresses harassed me asking was I ok, like they thought I did not really have any friends coming. I did not care if anyone thought I was aloner because I understood myself and was quite happy with my music and well into my book. My friends arrived and what a fantastic afternoon we had.
Then I went into pychosis because of the medication I was on for anxiety. Slowly people disappeared and now I am pretty much alone. I still have the small number of friends I had before but my work colleagues were not all my friends as I thought and that hurt no one asks me out anymore. I have learnt to amuse myself but I am happier surrounded by people whom let me be myself and except me for who i am. It like I am that 'mute' child again and have been afraid that I would become that again. This is because I have been repeatedly told to shut up, stop being me-me la la that its knocked my confidence. I am slowly regaining that and refusing to be mute unless I am busy thinking or dreaming!
Citalopram 20 mg (plus vit b complex and anti-stress medications and omega 3 - I am sure they did not help, I dumped all them). It is possible I have Candida, physical systoms fit and mental symtoms too and my diet is helping. I cut out diary when I was diagnosed with chronic sinitus and glue ear. I am weary about my soya intake (its helped my depressive moods after ovualtion but I am not sure if it making me more hyperactive after my first day of my period). I am thinking of changing to UHT milk or goats milk. There is something definite going on with my diet and I need professional help. I avoid gluten like the plague and try to avoid sugar, the gravings for chocolate have got the better for me, when it does I get hyperactive and can't get to sleep well.
Yep its the old tree pollen that getting me at the moment, taking anti-histimes and becanese. Dust is one, wash my sheets at 60 and use non-biological. I have contact dermitatas. My skin was nasty ithcy and felt horrible last night, I was sleeping-in at work. Someone changed the washing powder, bought 2in1 liquid there are also using too much. All the service user's clothes had that horrible feel when too much detirigent is used and it is not rinsed out of the clothes, no wonder he is scratching so much.
I don't know. In my late teens, sometimes when faced with sudden stress I would forget how to talk for a few hours or a day. At first my parents, mom especially, reacted with anger; they thought I was ignoring them. Once they realized I wasn't doing it on purpose, whenever it happened they'd try to calm me down and then give me my space until I could talk again.
Looking back, I wonder how much control I had over it. It was always scary, but always a relief too. I used to wish I couldn't talk, so I wouldn't have to worry about saying the right things.
<hugs>
Athie
I have selective mutism. It doesn't affect me as much now as it did when I was a kid, but I still have mute moments, especially if I'm approached when I'm not expecting to have to interact. Selective mutism is one of the most misunderstood disabilities; just because it's selective doesn't mean it's a choice.
Well I know I didn't actuallt start speaking at all until I was 3, and even now, there are a lot of times when I seem to know what to say, but I can't seem to actually get the words out. I'm not sure why, it just seems I either can't focus or I can't seem to start to talk. I suppose in reading this topic, selectivly mute seems to cover this quite well. It's extremely unhelpful and annoying, and wish it wasn't so with me.
The problem with "selectively mute" is that it already has a meaning that is heavily tied to anxiety. Which is fine if you are mute because of anxiety, but does not cover people like me, who when I could speak at all, did so intermittently, but anxiety was not really the primary factor in whether I could or could not speak at any given time.
Selective mutism just means inability to speak in certain circumstances or settings, with ability to speak in certain other circumstances or settings, and not being autistic. The diagnostic criteria for selective mutism do specify that the person not have an ASC. But, my childhood dx is selective mutism, back when it was called "elective" mutism, and it does accurately describe my verbal abilities (much more so when I was little than now), and this was before I was labeled ASC... honestly, I think parsing this stuff gives the "experts" much more credibility than I'm willing to give them. So I am just autistic and usually able to talk but occasionally not. I think that can be called "selective mutism" in the absence of a better term.
Trouble with "selective mutism" is that some people will judge it similarly to "selective deafness" and think that the person could speak if they really wanted to. Perhaps "intermittent mutism" would be a better way of describing it if it comes and goes. That then gets rid of any possible value judgements about the inability to speak at various stages.
Well I get mute at times,
In some noisy environments I tend to stop talking,
When I am with a group of people I tend not to speak
But I would not call that mute really.
But at times I can get drawn back to the point that I don’t meet people for a week, and during that time I usually do not speak at all.
This has not happened for about well 10 months now.
I guess I have a reason not to pull back as much as I used to…
But sure at times it has happened though, that I have stopped talking for about a day or so…
I don’t know why I do this, it may just be the simple fact that I don’t like talking.
Id rather talk without words.
Perhaps that is why I like spending time with authies so very much.
I lose the ability to speak when I am tired. This affects me worst if I am woken up unexpectedly, because for the first ten minutes of being awake I cannot make my mouth work properly. My vocal cords work fine, but I can't move my tongue and lips to make words.
As a result, if I want to say something, for example, 'Why on earth did you wake me up at this time?', it just comes out as 'Mmm...mm...mmmmm...mmm...mmm...mmmm...mm...mm...mm...mmmm...mmmm....'.
I get the opposite problem when I am in a situation which makes me anxious. My lips move to make the words I want to say, but my voice box refuses to work, so I end up mouthing the words silently.
This usually affects me with everyday tasks that I find stressful, such as talking to busdrivers or shopkeepers. Luckily this doesn't affect me as much as it used to.
hypochondriac668:
Judging asperger activity with second language acquisition is difficult. However, your experience is similar to mine when I studied in Japan. I almost found Japanese easier to communicate in. I can tell you though, as your aquisition increases, that ease goes away and you encounter problems communicating again. My suspicion, being that I am exceptionally good at picking up languages, is that it has something to with the script and grammar a language is in. Japanese and Chinese both use ideograms "picture-words", so learning these words is done not so much verbally but visually. The same is true with sign language. I've picked up all three pretty easily. But there is that pesky "communication barrier" we seem to hit once our social expectations are raised.