Aspies For Freedom

I disappear into my own thoughts at some moments, it could be when someone is talking to me. I am not sure if that was what you meant.

Mmmm, I usually just warn people that I am such I space case I will never remember to call them, so if they ever want to get in touch it'll have to be them doing the calling- or, if they go to a website I go to, like DeviantArt or LiveJournal, we can keep in contact that way.  That's how I stay in contact with my cousin who lives in Vermont (I'm in PA).

I do disappear for weeks and months ..... but i usually crop up again within a year or so.

A proverb says: "Make new friends but keep the old". So it is good to resurface every now and then and keep yourself in circulation.

Can be up to half a year or so, usually a couple of months (although there are times where I manage to go out maybe 2-3 times a month). 3 of my 4 friends (I only count people who are not family friends of my parents' since I don't go to see them on my own) live in Switzerland so I only see them once or twice a year, usually I can enjoy that but it is nice to go back and rest for a while.

Well out of my three friends one I contact every day or every other day, one I contact about once every week or fortnight, and the other about once every few months, if that.

But once I stop talking to somebody for longer than 4 months I will probably never talk to them again.

The longest I have spent without seeing anybody else is 2 weeks I think.

I love being alone. I very rarely feel lonely, and haven't really felt it regularly or strongly since my mid- to late teens. When it does happen though, I hate it, especially since, because I rarely interact with anyone, there is little I can do about it without a lot of effort to make new friends etc.

For me, it's mostly just that I have a very low need for social interaction, and 10 minutes on the bus chatting to a co-worker is often enough for me. A lot of the time it's interests taking over as well, and since I can't really focus on more than one thing, it's the interest that gets my time.

I am having a similar problem (not crying-severe but still) at the moment with a girl I usually catch the bus with in the morning. She's working with us for a year and we've always got on well, we haven't met outside work socially but sometimes try to catch the same bus together etc. and we chat about our home lives quite a bit.

Thing is, she did start "querying" me about why I don't socialise outside work, and "who do you socialise with from work the most" (to which I had to say "You", since the only other person I socialised with at and sometimes outside work has been working abroad for two years now and I stay in her house)...

Now I am not sure if she wanted to tell me, in a way, that she's upset I show no desire to do so with *her*, or if she genuinely finds it weird or strange that I don't socialise at work.

Anyway, I recently asked her for her mobile number because that is how I sometimes "socialise" outside work, i.e. by SMS. Plus it is handy because I can let her know if I am running late etc. and vice versa. She sent me a text message as soon as I gave her my number (I emailed it to her because she'd got in late that day and she works at the other side of the building), really friendly, calling me her "favourite cat lover" (I have 4 cats in the house) and jesting about "bus gossip"...

But at the same time this week and last she has also been a lot more "cold" towards me, and I do wonder if it isn't because my "bus gossip" (I tend to talk about bus connections and transport networks quite a bit, not in an obsessive way though, usually genuinely because it is part of my day to day life - e.g. I only talk about connections to and from work not random bus lines etc.) is annoying or boring her.

She's even started leaving her MP3 player on when I get to the bus stop so she doesn't "have to" talk to me (unless she is listening to an audio play as I sometimes do), yet she still sits with me on the bus like she used to...

The first time this happened, until she sat with me on the bus, I was afraid she might actually not have recognised me, because normally she gets up and stands with me to wait for the bus and takes her earphones out as soon as she sees me.

She was a bit irate the other day so I know she is perhaps stressed about something outside work, that could explain it in a way... (although normally she has always talked about these things to me)

At any rate it has really made me aware of how confusing this can be and it has made me look at the many times *I* do a similar thing when I'm too tired or simply unable to chat to someone.

I think it's actually gotten to the point where NT's feel the need to disappear. What with cell phones, emails, and the nonstop contact one is expected to keep with just about EVERYONE, the urge to disappear is overwhelming, and I think quite healthy. To paraphrase Judy Garland in Meet Me in St. Louis I hate, loathe, despise, and abominate cell phones!!! Everyone should try to disappear on a regular basis, as long as they're not skipping work or school.

Disappearing.

It's difficult for me to gauge how often, or for how long I disappear.  Family members would probably say I am shutting them out, dismissive, horrible, etc.  With most of them, I usually don't often initiate phone calls, visits or email-possibly months.  With other family members, more frequent contact feels right.  

In my technical occupation, I am very lucky.  I have my own office and electronics lab areas, separate from the main facility.  At work I can "disappear".  No one there hassles me about missing the picnic, softball game or holiday party.

In my life (sounds like I am not counting relatives and occupation as real, doesn't it?) I am fortunate because my wife understands my need for a few hours "disappearance" from time to time.

Why do I need to disappear?  I think it is too many stims from situations and people.  They wear me out, and I need to drop off the face of the planet for a while.   I can't imagine prolonged, forced social situations such as long holiday stays with relatives, company parties, or a full day of shopping.  The idea of it is like a prison.

Where do I go when I disappear?  Some of my escapes include a quiet office, reading, listening to classical music, walking, geocaching and amateur radio.

Long periods of time, months, year or two.  Depending on the context.

with me it can be days. People don't tend to call me unless they want something.

Nearly split US up

No matter; they won't care anyway.