Just posted a message elsewhere about this! Yes it happens to me, especially when distracted or stressed. I'm learning to say to people:
"I know you spoke to me a minute ago, but I couldn't take in what you were saying. Can you tell me again now, please?"
or
"Sorry, what did you say?"
I find NT's often just chat, and aren't too bothered and often can't even remember what they said or even if they spoke.
Thanks for focusing in on the important bit of Luai_lashire's post, I kind of didn't take it in.
I agree with what you said too.
Yes. I can concentrate on something I am reading or watching and apparently not hear a thing. My dad is the same so my family developed some stategies to deal with it. Calling a person is not enough, one must actually touch and them and acknowledge a reply from them. Any information conveyed must also receive acknowledgement or repeating back.
I hear the words people speak but somehow their meaning just floats around in my brain somewhere and never gets translated. Sometimes I repeat it back without understanding it. It is like a "wah, wah, wah." It happens more when I am tired or there are distractions.
Social training skills received: look at the person talking, nod or say "yes" every few minutes to acknowledge and give a person feedback. Stop doing other activities. Ask some questions about what they are saying. That is to make them feel better even if I don't really want to listen to them. It is supposed to be polite.
I prefer written instructions or notes such as put the trash out before you got to work. My mother tried to leaving the trash in front of the door but we were all confused about why she left it there and would just move it. Then she would become angry until she explained it was supposed to be a cue.
I think you are on to something here about communication in general. I hear the problem is your parents are frustrated they are not being heard.
When you do hear them what is common? Are they touching you? Is the environment quiet? Do they ask you to repeat it? Do you jot a note down about the infomation they wanted to convey? Do you repeat it in your head? Do you visualize what they are saying? Is it a certain time of day you hear them best? Do you hear them talking, but are unable to tune in? Is the information they are giving you in short sentences or a long string of sentences? Is the information related to something you are interested in for example: saying "First I want you to fold the laundry, second empty the dishwasher, and third let the dog out." There is a number sequence there that may be useful for a person who likes counting.
I would find your common thread from the times you HAVE heard your parents, and suggest to your parents "you understand they are frustrated and you want to be part of the solution," then tell them what the common thread is.
I do feel sympathy that you as the child have to be the one to step up to the plate, but you will find in time we adults are human too and we make many mistakes. You can give yourself and your parents a great gift if you can help figure out how to improve the communication gap that exists now. You are learning how to compensate for your differences as we all can Nt's, Aspies, young and old to improve our quality of life. It is a skill that can benefit you throughtout your life. Best of luck.
Advocate for children
my parents STILL yell at me for that ive been doing it sense i was little, at this point they pretty much expect it of me.
but see i have to concentrate to even understand or form a single word, ever, at all, so in my case personally i don't see how they can keep getting and when they Know i have trouble with words right? :\
i always say "right" "yeah" "okay' "i know" and repeat back something without realize i even did that. they get really annoyed, because i can not listen to them even if i try sometimes.
its the obsession thing, your not interested in things that don't apply to your obsessions.
maybe if you pretend they're going to lead the convo into something fascinating, but first they give you basic boring stuff that you don't feel any need to know..
*five minutes pass*
I'm sorry, did you say something? I was staring at my toe.