Aspies For Freedom

Hello,

I am a 38 year old Software Developer/Manager and I have been working with computers for nearly 26 years and I think I have Asperger’s Syndrome.

It all started when my brother came to visit this year (he comes every year for about 6-7 weeks) and my wife brought to my attention that he may be autistic.  At the time I was one of the many un-informed philistines out there so I didn’t believe her, so I did some research on the subject.  Now, I believe she is right, all the signs are there that he has Asperger’s Syndrome – he has the social capacity of an 11 yr old and he is 42! Enough about him.  While I was doing this research I have come to the conclusion that I have Asperger’s Syndrome as well, but I have either learnt to deal with a lot of the ‘problem’ areas or I have a very mild version of AS.

I am considered by all of my friends, the small group that I do have, and my colleagues as a bright and competent individual.  However, social situations still blow my mind, I was an incredibly ‘shy’ child and young man, and I have to hard work at each and every one or just plain avoid them.  I have many of the traits of AS, including an obsessive itch/scratching reflex; I am very well versed with technology and its applications, very imaginative and until recently depressed and occasionally suicidal.  I have managed to find a lovely woman whom I have a wonderful relationship/marriage to – oddly enough she was a trained Special Ed/Needs teacher – and she is very patient with me.  Without her I wouldn’t have gotten as far with my career as I am today.  I have taken several of the test and they indicate there is a good possibility that I am an Aspie.

Boy, this was hard to write it is one thing to accept yourself that you aren’t NT and another to actually bring yourself to write about it for others to see.

Hello. I agree it is hard to accept finding these things out about yourself but once you start writing about it it feels better. I was initially pleased to find out why I was different, but then I began to look at the past and how things might have been different had I known sooner which made be a bit unhappy. That feeling has passed now.

Hi silentwalker, welcome to the forum!

welcome

Silentwalker--sounds as if you're about to embark on the adventure of reviewing your life.  It's great that you're married to someone supportive.

Welcome to the forums Silentwalker.

Thanks for the greetings

I am currently reading a book called 'Change your Brain, Change your Life' by Dr D G Amen - I haven't gotten that far into it yet, but it is very interesting - which claims to offer way to help deal with some of the 'negatives' I encounter, I just hope if doesn't remove the positives.

The more I read about AS the more it doesn't seem like a completely negative syndrome, just different ways to view the world and some things that I hope I can work through or around.

Thanks again for the welcome.

Are you planning to seek any official/ professional opinion?

I have no plans on seeking a professional diagnosis.  I feel I handle my AS pretty well (my brother on the other hand..........) and seem to be coping quite well.  Really there are just a few things I need to work out, mostly the social side of things.

One thing that does baffle me is that I have very good hand/eye co-ordination (good enough to play reasonably high standing league table tennis as well as play to a reasonable degree most sports), which seems rare in Aspies (from what I have read).

Welcome.

  As I read that part, I caught myself scratching at my neck.

It gets easier.  I can hardly keep myself away from this site now.

There's debate on whether it's a good idea for an adult to get a dx if there are no serious problems going on, mainly in that it might come back to haunt you in unexpected legal situations years later.  You have to at least think about that.  However, it might be good for your brother's benefit if you get the diagnosis, so he won't think it's so odd to get one himself.