Hello. I am a mother of 6,5 y.o. autistic boy. My son is well-functioning and can say words. He learnes things very quickly, I teach him academics, and he absorbs knowledge very easily. My concern is that it is hard to teach him to use his knowledge in a "social" way. For example, I teach him how to read, I would like to hope that he will be able to read books, and find something interesting for himself in those books, and will have a desire to read another one, not because I tell him to do so, but because he is interested. Also, we teach him swimming and gymnastics, and my dream is that one day he would become proud of his accomplishments and want to go swimming and doing athletics beacause he will like it, not because they are "scheduled". I do not know how autistic (not aspreger) kids develop interests in this world - is it's possible at all? I heard of autistics who liked music, arts, animals. I am interested (vitally) how these interests developed and became functional, enjoyable, tools of self-expression in society.
May be it is connected to mental development? Once being asked what do I think he understands, I automatically answered "very simple, not complex phrases". But in fact I do not know how much he understands. His speech is ready-to-use 2-3 words combinations, several of them he uses often. But I read of autistics who are mute, and write books ...
What is inside? How can the parents help their child to express himself? Does the autistic child need it? Any insight is highly appreciated.
(i'm not a parent)first be opistive, and patient with him.
a possible start is to make this world interesting for him,join him in his play as many as you can. in other word become part of his world.at first just observe him to see what he like to play with or move around and then ask if he has a name for it or it's movement or motion, talk to him.He can talk thus he must hear what is said to him, try to teach him to read by saying a word and showing him what that word looks like then saying it again and spell it slowly while showing him the letter. i hope that help a little
(i'm not a parent)first be opistive, and patient with him.
a possible start is to make this world interesting for him,join him in his play as many as you can. in other word become part of his world.at first just observe him to see what he like to play with or move around and then ask if he has a name for it or it's movement or motion, talk to him.He can talk thus he must hear what is said to him, try to teach him to read by saying a word and showing him what that word looks like then saying it again and spell it slowly while showing him the letter. i hope that help a little
Hi gaurdian001, thank you for your input. Yes, that't what we need to do - to give him a choice what to do. I think when he was 3, and we started ABA sessions, we made a mistake. It was always like a study session, not fun. Since that age he understood that study and adults is work, not fun. When I engage him in something, he complies with very "tired" look, he does it in order to have me satisfied, to get his candy, and to run away. When he has a choice, he asks me to turn on video, always the same, puts it very loud and makes sound like "trrrrrr" while listening to it. I think he has pretty good sense of music. I tried to teach him play melodies on his little xilophone, but he wants to do it his own way... I trust him, I want to trust him, and give him a right to choose what to do. But I am just affraid to leave him alone when he makes that strange sound while putting TV on
50 degrees of loudness...
Why don't you try getting him a fish tank? Kids usually like those, and you can teach him all the names of the fish and everything, and teach him easy tasks like feeding the fish and turning off the fish tank lights. I remember doing that stuff when I was like three years old with my dad's fish tank, and now I'm obsessed with fish and majoring in animal biology at a university.
If are interested and need help setting up a fish tank, I can certainly help you with that.
My goodness... of course! Autie kids have special interests just like anyone else on the Spectrum. You might even say they're a bit obsessed. Surely you've heard of Temple Grandin and her cattle chutes? Now there's a special interest!
Don't worry if your son's interests are bit odd or nerdy; what matters is that he enjoys them and they build his mind and give him happiness. You just wait--you will have trouble getting him to STOP working on his hobby!
Incidentally, two-word phrases at age six is quite a good sign. Congratulations to your son on learning this. Some autistics don't learn speech until adulthood.
Autism is in part a hindrance to communication; a brain that likes to work alone... Your son most likely has thoughts and feelings that his language does not yet allow him to express, like a deaf person who does not know sign language. Watch his behavior instead; that communicates for him. (Even the meltdowns.
) From what I can gather, autistic people are happiest when they are able to communicate if they desire to do so, and when those around them listen to their communication. It is very frustrating to have a problem and not be able to verbalize it. Communication is key to the autistic child's education... Even Aspie children have to be taught nonverbal/emotional/social communication, or we'll attempt to use words only and be misunderstood!
The best you can do is to expand your son's experiences as far as possible. Watch for change-related anxiety and sensory problems, and go slower or back up whenever you hit those. Chances are that, given enough experiences (which in and of themselves are useful for any child, especially one who does not naturally like change) your son will find something he enjoys. The autistic mind is very well-suited to grabbing onto one or two subjects and becoming an absolute expert on them... Sometimes the subjects are weird or very narrow; but they are often useful for choosing later college majors and/or vocations. If Temple Grandin can make a career out of cattle chutes, your boy can make a career out of whatever he ends up getting obsessed with!
I dont know how much help I can be, I am 15 and self dx asperger's. I know in relation to interests, it would be helpful to help him develop those interests and share them with others in a way meaninful to them. I know that magic the gathering, one of my interests (probably my main one) has contributed greatly to my social skills simply becuase you have to play with others. After playing for 3 years now and going to tournaments for 2, I have been able to make friends I otherwise would not have. Instead of having the 1 friend that I hardly ever see anymore, I have several friends, albeit 0-8 years older than me. Although magic may not be what I am suggesting, it is incorperating it into social skills. For example what natalie said about the fish tank, other kids might think that it is cool if he were to show them it and teach them what he does/names of fish. I dont know what your son is interested in but that might be the best approach in terms of going with his interests and at the same time shoring up the weaknesses that he has. You also mentioned something about reading. Again incorperating what he is interested is important, reading a book about cartoons may not be as intersteing as a book on _________(his interest). From experience I know these things because it was always more enjoyable to read science fiction related to space than anything else. THen there is self-expression. I feel that one of the only times I can really be me is when I play magic the gathering. At school I am very very introverted. I am more of a "smart" figure than anything else. I dont like to reveal anything personel which is related to past experiences at that school. i am switching schools next year so hopefully that will get better.
So a lot of what i said may apply better to me, but a lot you can use yourself. Mainly it is to make things interesting and fun to him by using his own interests.
Thanks to everyone for your insights. I will try to apply them, and most important for us, to not concentrate myself around the idea of "intervention and therapy". I am used to think of my son as of very special child. From your comments I think, I can see that Ineed to bring more common sense and not to get histerical about autism.
Thanks everyone again, your support means a lot.