I cant stand being tickled. To me, a tickle sensation is a painful sensation. Once you start tickling me i instantanously start screaming in sheer agony.
But on the other hand I love it when people play with my hair, like putting in those mini braids or just touching it in general. That kind of tickle is a good feeling.
As a child, my sister brushed my hair and always complained how tangled it is. I often threw tantrums and she complained more. She was impatient, and always told me to look up. She grabbed me and brushed my hair vigorously, and tied my hair back too tight. It was very uncomfortable. I'm so glad i don't have to have my whiny sister brush for me anymore. My mom often brushed my hair too, though not as nasty about it, she always wanted it to be in a braid, and still brushed too hard. I brush my hair gently and slowly, until it is nice and fluffy. Sometimes I even take my brush to school and brush there when my hair is dry. I don't see why brushing your hair in public would be such a big deal, as long as you're not brushing during class.
What really annoyes me to no end, is where other women will poke, pat, or stroke me from behind (usualy the shoulder) as softly as possible just to get my attention for two useless seconds. I hate that but learned to not show it very much. I don't like seeing other people gently pet or pat someone else's shoulder either because it makes me think about the feeling.
Anyway, when they do touch me that way I can feel this little zing go all the way to my spine then up to my head. Then the feeling of being poked stays a few minutes to remind me that it just happened. I don't need the reminder, and I have told them to stop it. The fact that they keep doing it bites. I would much rather they stepped to the side of me and said hello instead of putting their hand on me every flipping time.
I hate the feel of things being around my neck, even if it's just a slightly high collar it really gets on my nerves. That may just be some fear of getting strangled though, I dunno.
I don't like kissing either, and I don't like the thought of being touched anywhere generally covered by clothing. Holding hands or linking arms doesn't bother me, nor do hugs as long as I know the people.
People bumping into me can cause me to push them away quite roughly if I'm in a bad mood, but I've noticed lots of NTs react that way to.
I have read that most autistic people prefer to be touched firmly than lightly in a tickling way. The hair brushing also seems to be a common problem. I generally do not like having other people touch my hair. One aspie guy obsessed with me used to run his fingers down strands of my hair, quite uninvited, and much to my annoyance.
I have solved my hair tangle problem by getting an electric comb that takes out bad tangles. I also braid my hair to sleep so less fuss is in the morning. I have long, non styled hair that does not require excessive washing, blow drying, trips to hair stylist, brushing, curling etc.
I hate when woman (or anyone) does the hug and peck peck cheek thing to me. I just tolerate it. I like to kiss my parents on the cheek and my husband is ok. Sometimes my neices kiss me on the cheek. That is ok - just close family - anyone else - it makes my skin crawl.
I also cant stand it when my hair is static and the ends of it are attracked to my nose, it's so freaken itchy. Or when you step outside in the morning to go to school or something and then BAM your hair is on your lip gloss because of the gust of wind.
I am very "touchy-feely". I know that might sound kind of pervy and gross, but I am not like that. I have no problem with being touched at all and happy to give anyone a hug or what not. I have a better (but certainly not perfect) understanding than what I had when I was younger, about the level of appropriate contact allowable for different occassions and differing relationships with people. Which is good, because what is childish and endearing will not always be excused as you get older.
Some of the girls at work for instance, if they are upset, I will just go up and say "You ok mate?" If they still look upset I will normally give them a quick firm hug and ask them if they want to talk about it or if there is anything I can help with. The key issue here is I am not being sleazy and the hug is "from the shoulders rather than the waist" is this makes sense. If they cry I normally just rub their back or shoulder until they stop. No one has ever had a go at me about this and the girls in question don't seem to think any the less of me for it. More well-disposed to me if anything.
I know this sounds bizzare but I enjoy the sensation of being tightly squeezed or squashed - hypo-sensitive tactility. As a little boy I used to get between two heavy mattresses and have friends, brother or whatever bounce or jump on it. I don't notice light touching on my skin. I love playing with my kids and tickling them - they love it, occassionally my little boy or daughter tries to reciprocate in tickling me back. I am not at all ticklish and do not know how to react. What is worse is my little boy has picked up that I don't react easily to pain and has annoyingly developed a habit of "trying to hurt me" deliberately. He will do something and ask whether it hurt me. Not in anger or even I think in malice, but just curiosity. He isn't interested in my lectures of why trying to hurt people is wrong but I think is focussing on my level of stress or reaction to pain. Creepy!
Sorry gone off track completely!
Yes, I could be one of those people because I don't always understand if someone is just being nice or they really like me.
Its funny I have only ever had the whole "You shouldn't be doing that" speech. That was years ago. A boss called me aside and started talking to me about sexual harrassment and the implications of it. I think she expected me to be cow-towed about it. I said, "OK why are you talking to me about this? I know what sexual harrassment is." Her assertiveness faltered a little and she mentioned that I hugged some of the girls at work on occassions, and so on. I asked whether and which of them had a problem with it. She told me due to privacy, blah, blah, blah. I replied that I had obviously upset one of them and owed them the mother of all apologies. In doing this it put her off track and she accidentally let slip that the complaint hadn't come from any of the girls and in fact they didn't seem to have an issue. It was another unnamable person who raised the issue.
I really got mad and told her she and the other person if they existed (I actually thought it was all her) could go to hell and keep their noses out of other people's business.
I got in trouble then by the manager for having a go at her, but really!
Aside from that as I say I think because I am not fondling women, or groping them we I comfort them and don't use the opprtunity as a "springboard" to anything else they seem to take it extremely well and are far nicer and more receptive to me after that.
In the same way that blokes are with you if you help defend them or one of their mates in a fight (even if it is just to help defuse the fight). It's just a weird "Hey Rossco! How ya doing mate? What were you up to on the week-end?" rather than a polite nod like before.
The girls too become as I say friendlier and so forth. With my upcoming interstate move I have been stressing about what would happen if I badly calculated or was unlucky in calculating the courier, last inspectiion and leaving. I have been stressed about being temporarily without a house. One of those girls mentioned this and said stay at my place, here's my number and address. Any time time mate. You don't have a car I am happy to shuttle you anywhere give me a call. Hardly know the girl! But hey that is one less stress. Damn rambling again!
I also loved being squeezed. When i was younger i used to havemy little sister lay on top of me, and i like tight clothes too. I love tight fitting jeans and shirts. I also wear long sleeves cause im freezing but the sleeves have to be tight cause i cant stand the loose fabric.
I knew my now ex through a friend of a friend that I worked with. At 20 - 21 I used to go to work social sundowners at pubs and clubs with the work vrew and she was often invited along. I was just friends with her.
Several years kater she confessed that in the ladies toilets she heard many of the young girls who I was friendly with say they would have liked to have slept with me or go out with me, but I had never asked.
I was incredulous "Which one's were they? And why didn't you tell me? We were just mates back then"
She said she didn't remember which ones and that at the time she thought the information best kept to herself as she fancied me herself.
DAMN!
I've noticed that. Hypo or hyper-sensitivity I guess
Well I am all loved up tonight. I just came back from an all-nighter. I went to a house-warming party at a friends house. I didn't realise that it was actually a send-off for me. Heaps of people turned up and I spent all night dancing, drinking and yes hugging people and kissing people (kissing the girls).
All my female friends are really good about it. I hug my male friends too, but in more of a "manly" bearhug kind of a way.
I honestly find hugging as very "centreing". It is nice too. The fact that the girls are all young and pretty and I am neither I think is part of the reason they see me as just harmlessly affectionate. They are also good mates and probably realise if I was going to try it on with them I would have years ago.