Could anyone give me any advise on how best to approach the situation of the new school, the new teachers,changing classes,all the stuff that comes with starting middle school for my aspie daughter? :?
Last year with her 5th grade teacher I made the mistake of assuming she knew of my daughters condition and had some kind of understanding of it and her needs, boy was I wrong. :o
This next year is going to be trying enough with out going in to the new situation blind.
I have learned a lot of things pertaining to her EIP and how to get it to reflect her needs, especially when it comes to communication between the teachers and I. There is nothing you can do about a problem when you are only made aware of it at the end of the year. :shock:
I am most likely worrying to much and everything will be fine, she has a positive attitude so I'm not letting her know how terrified I am!! :lol:
But.... If anyone who has survived these next few years can advise me I would greatly appreciate it.
Okay,I will try to do my best to give you advice that may help.
1. NEW TEACHERS. If your daughter is panicy about meeting a new teacher, perhaps she can meet her teachers ahead of time. If your school has an open house before classes start, see if your daughter would like to come with you and meet her new teachers. If she would like to meet her teachers ahead, but dose not want to go when there are so many people, see if you can set a time where you and your daughter can go into the school when her teachers will be there, and briefely meet(I say breifely because, for me I would not realy have been able to talk much/at all, to people that I do not know. You know your daughter best, and you know almost as well as she dose, what is comfortable.) Do not make her speak to the teachers if she is not comfortable, do not force eye contact, handshakes, the like. Most importantly ask your daughter what she feels will help.
2. NEW SCHOOL. Check with the administration, and see if you can go to the school a few times and walk around it, so that your daughter is farmiliar with the layout, the landmarks, and the like. See if you can get a copy of her schedule ahead of time. Place the binders/notebooks folders that she uses for each class in her locker(if she will have one) befor school starts, thus reduceing the stress of orgognizing this as she tries to get to class. If you can get a schedule, have her go about the rutine she will have to in school. Have her go to her locker to get the things for her first class, walk to her first class, get things for second class, walk to second class and so forth. Pay attention to the time it takes, and help her decide whether she will need to take materials for two classes, because she will not have enough time in between.
3. CHANGING CLASSES. As above, practice. See if your daughter and the school staff are comfortable with her mabye leaving class a few minutes early, perhaps the first week or so, or continulay if needed and appropriate. This would help her get to classes on time, as well as reduce the stress of a lot of people in the halway.
4. TEACHER COMUNICATION. If your daughter is placed in a class where a teacher is compleately wrong for her, talk to her guidance counseler. A teacher not willing to work with your daughter eficiantly will ruin her GPA, and her self esteem. If you are woried about teacher knowledge, try to talk to them ahead of time, or within the first few weeks.
5. WORRY. If your daughter is not woried about it, don't worry about changing it. If she thinks she will be okay entering a new situation without preperation, then so be it. She is probobly right. If you make her do something that makes her feel diferent, and she feels she would have been alright without this diferance, she will most likely not be happy.
Good luck to you, as well as your daughter.
If your daughter would like to come on to AFF, to talk about school or anything else, she is welcome. I beleive that there are a few members in middle school/Juinior high, as well as some in high school(myself included).
3. CHANGING CLASSES. As above, practice. See if your daughter and the school staff are comfortable with her mabye leaving class a few minutes early, perhaps the first week or so, or continulay if needed and appropriate.
That's a big if. There are schools that would rather just flunk kids than let them violate such an all-holy principle as the school's sacrosanct one-size-fits-none schedule and child movement rules. I'm not being hypothetical.
What I have read in the professional research literature on educator attitudes and seen firsthand for my son is that "educators" prefer to blame children and families for everything. The pedagogy is flawless, the teachers are flawless, the administrators are flawless, just ask any school district official or employee.
changing classes. Even at college, I used to have difficulty finding my classes or knowing which class was next. I luckily had a friend who had almost the same classes as me and just took me everywhere.
myownmind wrote:
3. CHANGING CLASSES. As above, practice. See if your daughter and the school staff are comfortable with her mabye leaving class a few minutes early, perhaps the first week or so, or continulay if needed and appropriate.
Dogface wrote:
That's a big if. There are schools that would rather just flunk kids than let them violate such an all-holy principle as the school's sacrosanct one-size-fits-none schedule and child movement rules. I'm not being hypothetical.
What I have read in the professional research literature on educator attitudes and seen firsthand for my son is that "educators" prefer to blame children and families for everything. The pedagogy is flawless, the teachers are flawless, the administrators are flawless, just ask any school district official or employee.
If they won't let her leave classes early, I would suggest just locating all of her classrooms before school starts, and practicing how to get to each one. Perhaps a time could be arranged to do this during a teacher work day or something similar.
In the US, whatever educational needs are written into her Individualized Education Program (IEP - if she has one) are required (by federal law) to be accommodated.
And, there are some schools who are dedicated to helping all students based on their individuals needs, but not all of them do. I think meeting and speaking with teachers beforehand is a good idea.
She might be better staying as main stream as possible if she hasn't needed an IEP in the past, as it might help with social skills and so on.
You could ask if she could be paired up with another older student when changing classes so that a) she can find her way and b)she won't be targeted by any pushing and shoving by those who tend to brawl rather than walk to their next class. Only do this if she expresses anxiety/ has problems though, you wouldn't want her to feel singled out.
Folks love to jump on the IEP bandwagon, but it often isn't necessary. If the school does not want to cooperate informally, there are alternatives to an IDEA-mandated IEP. The IEP-based approach has some weaknesses. First, it requires hard labeling with a specific "disorder". Second, it only requires provision of a "free, appropriate public education". The law says nothing at all about it being of any quality at all. This particular FAPE can even be fundamentally inferior education than what is received by others, so long as it is "free", "appropriate", and "public". "Appropriate" is a great weasel word.
On the other hand, Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973 prohibits discrimination on the basis of disability. Once IDEA got passed, boards of education and public school administrators quietly swept Section 504 under the rug, hoping it would be completely forgottten, and it almost has. There is a FAPE for Section 504, but it has a different legal definition. While the FAPE of IDEA is exclusively restricted to "special education services", which are legally limited to "specially-designed instruction". The school pretends that anything else it would do is done entirely out of the pure shining virtue that all public employees have. The FAPE of Section 504, on the other hand, is defined around providing education comparable to that provided to students without disabilities, and "comparable" under anti-discrimination law INCLUDES some measure of "outcome" in US jurisprudence. Outcome does not factor in US jurisprudence regarding "disability" law.
Thus, while an IDEA-type IEP can be helpful, it is not always the best possible choice. There are times when one might wish to resort to anti-discrimination law instead of disability law.
But try to work with the school before resorting to law.
5. WORRY. If your daughter is not woried about it, don't worry about changing it. If she thinks she will be okay entering a new situation without preperation, then so be it. She is probobly right. If you make her do something that makes her feel diferent, and she feels she would have been alright without this diferance, she will most likely not be happy.
Oh my, how much I stress this last part. If the Prime Subject's (the child in question) opinion on special assistance is negative, it must count. Unnecessary special assistance may hinder her performance and visible assistance (meaning other students can see it at work and recognise it) may lower her social image, causing her to be bullied, lowering self esteem. You see, if a middle-school student is seen with constant special educational assistance everyday, that only heightens the chance of an NT student calling her "mentally retarded". This is the problem I have. Unwanted help slowing down my performance and how other people view me.