I am accused of bumping to people and passing by them too closely and scaring them. I am not so good at judging distances and have to think about how close I should stand to someone when talking to them or just being near them. I am also clumsy. Someone called my "a bull in a china shop" because I had to walk by them carrying alot of stuff, through a narrow passage. I was saying "excuse me, excuse me" all the time and I could not wait for the passage to be more clear.
Is there something about people with AS not being good at judging distance or using peripheral vision? Do NT's always use their peripheral vision when walking around? I just use it when I am trying to march in formation so I can try to line up beside someone else but it is really really hard to do.
My depth perception has been tested and was very poor. I am very clumsy too, and have been called dangerous whilst pushing a shopping trolley/cart.
My husband won't let me drive the shopping cart because I run over his feet and smash into everything.
The most unexpected result of getting my colourimetry glasses was that I stopped bumping into people. I used to move through crowds in a kind of Brownian motion, bumping into people, apologising, then moving off just to bump into someone else again! I only noticed that I wasn't doing that any more when I realised that I hadn't said sorry for about half an hour - and realised that was because I hadn't bumped into anyone.
This is something I find difficult too. When I am walking through the busy city streets at lunchtime, I have to concentrate very hard to avoid bumping into people. Luckily, I've never actually bumped anyone, but I have come close several times! There are so many people walking in all different directions, and I find it disorientating. It seems easy for everyone else though.
There was a time a couple of weeks ago, when I was walking to a cafe for lunch, and I had to walk down a very busy (pedestrianised) street in order to get to it. Suddenly, there was this man walking towards me, and I had to try to swerve to avoid him. I didn't know which direction to step in, so I first stepped left, but I still seemed to be in his way, so then I stepped to the right. As he walked past me, I heard him make a noise which sounded like he was tutting. Maybe he thought I was drunk and that I couldn't walk straight! :lol:
I guess this is one of the areas I may have an Aspie related gene ... As I bumped my head into the roof of my car while I was getting into my car today, as I do insanely often, I was definitely thinking of you all and this thread! I bump into people, into things ... crazy.
I am pretty clumsy. If I don't remember I'm holding something I'll drop it, and I sort of lurch when I walk (reminiscent of what they said about Gen. Stonewall Jackson, that he looked as though "he was only occupying his body for the duration"). However, I used to do aikido when I was an undergraduate, and I was pretty graceful at that.
I also have a terrible time judging distances, but I do not know if that is because I have Asperger's or because I am blind in one eye.
I don't use peripheral vision very much though. Something to think about.
Even though I am very clumsy and klutzy. I learned how to drive and I know I am not a great driver, its gets me from point a to point b. When driving I have to completely focus on the road even though I like to listen to the radio music like everybody else.
I know i shouldn't do that, but I should just focus on the driving.
Driving a car and scanning ultrasound through the body on vessels and the esp the heart has helped me out with all that. I know it will take time like anything else.
I have a problem as well with bumping into people, but maybe for another reason.. first of all I react too slowly, don't notice people, or something (maybe it's also because of something else I don't know) so then I bump into people a little on the side... but a lot more interesting is the fact that I often have a problem with choosing which side to pass a person who is coming towards me. I have had it that we both tried avoiding eachother up to 3 times (eg left right left), before eventually bumping into eachother anyway!!!!! now that must be utterly funny to see :grin: and it happened several times by now, so this really must be some kind of judgmental error or choosing problem I have.... :roll:
but a lot more interesting is the fact that I often have a problem with choosing which side to pass a person who is coming towards me. I have had it that we both tried avoiding eachother up to 3 times (eg left right left), before eventually bumping into eachother anyway!!!!! now that must be utterly funny to see and it happened several times by now, so this really must be some kind of judgmental error or choosing problem I have....
This happens to me too, although usually I can avoid bumping into the person.
Most people seem to just do it by intuition, so I wonder if it has to do with some sort of body launguage or something that I'm not picking up on.
i find i can't walk next to anyone without alternately bumping in to them or wildly swerving away from them...
so i only really got out with my boyfreind, and hold his hand, or with my mum, and i still hold her hand too..
but i dont genrally bump into other people, as im usally trying to keep as far away from them as possible.. but i do bump into shelves and things whilst trying to avoid the people..
i gave up learning to drive, mainly because i couldn't concentrate on all things you need to at once, but also because i coulnt tell how close i was to things, or if i was going in a straight line....
I've never been outright accused but yes it happens a lot. I am getting better over time though, the weird thing is I am starting to learn more about Theory of Mind and traffic (even people traffic) is where it seems to apply most for me, since that is the main interaction I have with people.
For example last week I realised I made a big ToM gaffe: I was in a side street trying to cross it, and thought: "Oh, well there is a car parked on this side, so I am safe getting onto the road as far as it is blocked by the car, after all no other car will go there because a car is in the way."
Then I nearly got run over by a car coming round the corner. It was only then that I realised that of course the cars coming round the corner will not KNOW that a car is standing there so will not move out of the way in advance
I tend to bang into other people's shopping cart as I walk by and bump into other people but I don't know when I'm doing it. I was told I did those things but I couldn't rememebr doing them so simply I was unaware of what was going around me
I've gotten a little bit better at noticing this but it still happens a lot. One thing I have developed over time is that every time I bump into something I automatically say "Oow" quietly, even though it never hurts. It used to bug the heck out of my first boyfriend and my ex but hey at least it draws attention to it and I tend to become able to focus a bit more on the outside world, however briefly.
When I was with my boyfriend, he pointed things out to me but now we are separated for now but we're still together but not literally. We had to move out of his aprtment and he went to his parents and I went to my aunt's and uncle's.
My first boyfriend and my ex used to do this in a not so nice way, but my current partner does this the way your boyfriend seems to. I can't always stop myself but he has brought a lot of things to my attention that I had no idea I was even doing them.
I'm ok as long as I'm concentrating, I sometimes misjudge stairs and trip or grind my elbow on the textured walls which grazes really bad. I walk into doors I havn't quite opened fully.
Yup, doors are a biggie for me. There also used to be a covering along the bottom of the wall in my bedroom as a kid/teen. and I'd constantly whack my right foot into it and knock the corner piece out.
I sat on my dog once and punched him when I tried to say sorry.
Sorry but that sounded so funny... Poor doggie. Happens with my partner all the time, the poor soul... (Not sitting on him, I have my seat, he has the sofa, although I have sat on his hands and feet before - I meant I stand on his feet etc. and elbow him by accident)
I can't walk right and carry something at the same time, I always spill hot drinks.
I have gotten a lot better at not spilling things but my ex used to say when the living room in his house was done up (it never was!) I wouldn't be allowed in there any more, at least not with drinks. 
Where I live now there was a giant wax stain on the living room floor and countless red wine stains courtesy of my boss, so I don't feel too bad about spilling the odd bit of tea.
My dad once had one of those chain reaction moments you see in cartoons, he dropped a spoon or something and practically destroyed someones kitchen. It makes me laugh when he tells me the story.
I can imagine how funny that must sound! Perhaps not for the person whose kitch it was, mind you.
I have a little problem going into other things in a different way I think. Maybe not to quite the same degree either. I have a little something in my brain that wants me to get closer to things that are next to me instead of infront while I move. I hate driving next to eight wheeled delivery trucks, and next to walls and concrete dividers because I have to focus on moveing straight forward more, and try not to notice them.
For some reason my focus was makeing me drive into them a little bit closer by the second, so I had to learn, after my mother's last warning, not to drive into things that I pass. I had dented the passenger side doorway of my lost car, three times in the same spot on one metal pole. 'blush'