Aspies For Freedom

Although I cannot speak for the skill other ASD people may have in "faking" normality, my Asperger's son is a dismal failure at "faking."  Unfortunately, he has very little insight into the fact that his act is not convincing.  He gets very annoyed with me because I encourage him to disclose his situation to people he spends a lot of time with and with authorities he encounters all too often.  This is because he believes no one can tell there is something different about him and he doesn't want to be seen as disabled.

However, I have known forever that he is viewed differently than others, even before he was diagnosed.  Recently, his girlfriend disclosed to me that her friends frequently ask her what is "wrong" with him and comment on his lack of expressiveness and "common sense."  She is bipolar and at times exhibits behavior that is quite socially unacceptable. Most of their mutual acquaintances are social outcasts for similar reasons.  Although they do not reject my son, they seem to believe he is "brain damaged" and find his social mistakes funny, even when the consequences are horrible.   To make matters worse, he is so anxious to have friends that he seems willing to suffer extreme consequences in an effort to "hide" his condition.  

Any feedback would be welcome.  

Gwyn

The way I get "respect yo nigga :lol: " from people, is those who treat me well, I treat well, those who do not, get seven hells beaten out of them.


I do not even pretend to act NT, nor would I, I am known as a bit of a psycho, for things done to people who f**k over my friends, but hell, thats me, and I don't need to change :smile:

Well, I personally believe that we should all follow our interests. Of course, we all know, our intensity in our interests. Just keep working on that and eventually go to school clubs around that interest and get a job around that. People will respect you for that.

I, for example, am a geography geek. I can tell you that Mzuzu is a city in Malawi. So I joined Amnesty International and I work really hard on it.

And because I joined  Amnesty, I get a lot of respect.

I'll probably end up working for Amnesty.

As for acting NT, I never will succeed and it's a losing battle, I just make the best of what I have.

I don't bother trying to fake normalty.

I'm currently trying to make my Artist tower stand taller than my Weird tower. People appear to know me more as an artist than a weird kid.

My chain pants (which I love very much) seem to help with drawing the idea that I chosed to be different rather than I was born different.

Someone mentioned popular fashion.. I don't get it 100% myself.
But I'm not saying I don't like clothes.. I have my own sense of style and if kids make some snide comment about some element or other I just ignore them, they're kids after all.. what do they know.

So my cap doesn't go with my shirt -- or something else. I chose it because I liked it for whatever reason I liked it for.

Young people can be such sheep.. seriously I lose count of how many teens - early twenties I see in a day that are wearing their pants/trousers/jeans/ shorts slouched so damn low they keep tugging their shirt or sweater down because their backside is cold...
I often find I have this itching need to explain that: "This part here.. this is a w-a-i-s-t b-a-n-d. Your waist is a-b-o-v-e your behind."

seriously? Why do they even bother wearing pants if they're so set on showing off their underwear?

That's a very good point, tenaciouscj.

It is a sort of social phenomenon in Italy, too!!!  :shock:

I don't believe I've ever tried to "fake" to fit in anywhere. I think that telling the truth and being what people call tactless is a good thing. And I don't think any of my mannerisms are offensive, although I do not have many at all that differ strikingly from the everyday person. I do not care greatly anyway.

I don't think I'd even be able to fake being the same as others for even a whole day. My real self would slip through, I think. I don't see how people can do it.

Most people don't even notice it (for me at least). They tend to only notice how withdrawn I am and my hatred for anything romantic. They do view me as arrogant simply because I stand up for myself and refuse to be put down.

Most people in this world have lost their minds! They rely on their feelings and hardly think deeply about anything, little alone subjects they find not compatible with their morals/ethics/ect.

I bet that society treats us like dogs because they feel like dogs themselves. They see a diffrent person and they they see a person who needs to "shape up".

I hope one day I can live out in nature and find peace...[/img]

I have a saying - You have the right to be yourself and no one can take that away from you.

I live by that, and I will always blast anyone who tries to make me change. Especially when it involves my interests. I do have a couple which involve community participation, but it's hard as I am going in an eccentric direction - which doesn't always get the respect that I believe it should. We live in a society that is becoming more and more intolerant as we spiral backwards thanks to extremists on several political and religious fronts.

Acting is lying - and no Aspie can cope with that long term. I even have a problem with it short term. I'm better when there's truth involved (ie manipulating the truth instead of lying).

Actually, what's fun for me is not so much faking normality as occasionally surprising the heck out of people (Holy moly! He can actually dance! I can't believe that clumsy awkward geeky guy can dance!). It's way more fun than trying to pass.

Maybe I should try acting Ghetto for a day as a joke. Then when people asked me what the hell I was doing, I'll tell them I'm acting like a normal person. xD No seriously. I think New Britain has been eaten by the Ghetto subculture.

Once when I joined a co-ed street hockey team I felt like I had no idea what to do and was very awkward and nervous. So I decided to pretend I was an actress playing the part of a hockey player. It worked for me and people couldn't believe it was my first time - that is until I just about passed out.  It's hard to fake 'in shape'.

The league got too competitive for me with people taking things too seriously so I quit... and also I didn't like being reminded of how out of shape I was. I might have actually liked it if I didn't feel lung and muscle pain every time... and if there was no risk someone getting pissed at me because I got wise and held my ground when she tried to steal the ball instead of letting her plow into me and take it.

She bounced off of me and got a *** lip when she hit the ground. I must have apologized 5x and she wouldn't even look at me and said all sorts of nasty things about me to her teammates.

Not my kind of people.

Are you talking to me or Rossco, Ian?

I'm talking to the thread.