I KNOW Alex loves me by the way he briefly rests his forehead on mine, or his hand on my arm by the panicky squeak he gives if I'm not where he thinks when he wakes up, the way he looks at me and then has to have a sudden, joyful, beaming-smiled flap.
So lovable...and I don't even LIKE children. :smile:
Maybe we place less emphasis on the spoken word than NTs do.
One of my common sayings is 'Actions speak louder than words'.
I totally agree with you Amy actions do speaker louder words and that is one of my favourite sayings.
:wink:
I used to tell my parents "I love you" everytime I saw them, then it merged into a quick "luvyu" and I think I probably stopped entirely around when they put me on Zoloft.
I try to say it occasionally, but I certainly don't do like my little brother who (at 14) bugs my mother, then when she starts to get annoyed tells her that he loves her.
I do say "thank you" and "sir/ma'am" rather complusively, I spent early childhood next-door to a Texan expatriate, but I rarely say please since "Could you do x please?" sounds more demanding than simply "Could you do this?" or "Would you be able to do this?"
I also say "excuse me" or "perdon" (which I like to use) when pushing through crowds, but I tend to mutter it.
In the airport a few weeks ago I was trying to get past some luggage that along with a fat woman was completely blocking my way.
I asked her to move or move the luggage ("Excuse me ma'am, could I please join my mother?" several times) it and she didn't respond, or even look at me so finally I tied to stop over it (two layers deep, and not easy. Definitely exceeded the carry-on size as well.
At this point, a man who I assumed to be her husband said angrily "Excuse me?"
I told him that I was trying to get to my mother, waiting in line at the other side, and he just glared at me.
So I asked my mother what I did wrong.
When we got on the plane she said that it was his luggage.
It as right next to the woman and about 4-5 feet from him, with thw woman and a few empty feet between.
How was I supposed to know that? And why didn't he or the woman respond when I ask.
Any rate, I digress.
"luvyumum", maybe 100 times a day?
At one point there was a whole huggy ritual around it and I couldn't cross the street without a hug half way through the intersection, and I HAD to reply in kind.
I'm more bothered by people who expect and sometimes force the issue of hand shaking, he does NOT shake hands with relative strangers! Why on earth would an adult judge his "politeness" on this?
Quintucket, you just sound Canadian to me :-) I used to have to call the US all the time at work and was told more than once that my politeness verged on obsessive, but everyone around me is just as polite.
I often have trouble interpreting actions, so I tend to get worried if my mother, my roommate, my friends, don't say "I love you" or "Yes, you are my friend." I'm also pretty depressed, so I assume that those who love me will change their minds, so I ask them repeatedly, and they get annoyed.
When I was little, I made my parents say goodnight to me in a special way every night, lest they die.
You know, I just remembered something that I heard when my great-grandmother died.
She had never once in their lives told her children she loved them.
Just a note though.
Maybe we place less emphasis on the spoken word than NTs do.
One of my common sayings is 'Actions speak louder than words'.
I agree with you amy, however.... i find it odd that we place less emphasis on the spoken word, if we have difficulty with reading body language... do you have any ideas on how this is possible?
... do some non-AS parents set SO much importance on their kid saying 'I love you'? To the point where if a kid cant or doesn't that must be a terrible terrible thing. Sure, it must be nice to hear, but is it really that important?
Because magic spells use words.
I think itīs important to assure your children that you love them by telling them so. Sometimes children might feel that theyīre not being loved if the parent yells at them or disciplines them, so itīs a good thing to reassure them about it once in a while. More important I think is to tell your kid that they are good children. If you say "you are a good kid" to a child, it shows them that you appreciate them even though they sometimes act up and give you a hard time. As for parents needing their children to tell it back, well itīs lovely to get that kind of a statement from your child and it reassures you that youīre doing a good job as a parent, but I donīt think itīs something you should force your kid to do. If they do it by themselves itīs all that more sweet when it happens. :grin: