Aspies For Freedom

This is something that happens at my school a lot, for example this situation that happened yesterday when I was walking down one of the hallways

random NT person: "What's up?"
me: "I'm walking to my next class"
NT person walks away.

Is there something I'm not getting here, or is my school just populated by really unobservant people?

If it's someone that is a total stranger to you, he or she might have simply meant it as a friendly greeting.   Young guys are particularly fond of greeting other guys with either "what's up" or "what's going on".  

  When a NT asks, "what's up" or "what's going on", the safest possible answer is:

"Not much, what's up with you"?  

This answer is almost always considered appropriate.  If it's someone you know, and something really important has happened, you could respond by telling them about it.  In most cases, though, the question "what's up" has kind of a nonliteral meaning.   It really is basically the same as saying "hello".  

If it's someone you know, and they continue looking at your face after they ask "what's up", then they most likely are expecting you to make small talk.  

The NT that asked you "what's up" might have thought you didn't want to talk to them when you responded with "I'm walking to my next class".   As The fREaK said, he or she probably really wanted you to make small talk and interpreted your answer to mean something like "Don't bother me right now.  I don't want to talk to you because I'm walking to my next class".

I ask that too but I don't care what they answer.

why can't people just say what they mean? it would really make communication much much easier!!

i havea few friends that come up to me and say "Hey man!" and i'm female, jokingly i reply back to them "in case you've forgotten, i'm female" many of them laugh...

but really why do things have to be so complex? why does one sentence or phrase need to mean 10 or more things? I can usually understand what people are meaning now, but gosh i'm so tired at the end of the day from all the thinking and processing i need to do

Or more acurately, it's pronounced "WAZZAAAP!!"

:grin:

As a more or less NT mom raising an Aspie child, I've found this thread really instructive.  My instinct in response to the question about what does "what's up" mean was to ask more about context and tone of voice.  Those things can shade and change the meaning, but can also be difficult for anyone, including some of us NT's, to take note of.  As I understand it, all that stuff is extra difficult for Apies.  But there are practical answers in this thread of ways to respond that should work no matter the nuance.  Love it!

I use "whats up!?" sometimes when I speak to my sisters over the phone.

When my uncle would come over he'd say "whats up!" and we would respond that we're well and nothing new..etc.  Then we would ask him the same and he'd say "the sky, stars, sun, moon!!"

I prefer to speak "properly" but then again I hardly speak at all socially.........

Easiest thing to do when asked "What's up?" is to just say "Not much, I'm off to my next class so I'll talk to you later", that way you don't appear rude.

How odd that someone joining an autistics forum with the screenname AntiAspie would be concerned about rudeness.

You're only adding to my judgemental views. I have found that every person that I have ever come accross with "Aspergers Syndrome" to be a complete and utter ****. (No, before you, Amy, ban me for that comment, it's not a personal insult, get it straight).

Hey, I get that often. When they don't get it. The humour.

Hmm. . .
You're NT right?

You therefore take any social ineptitude as jerkiness, si?

So yep, I suppose by that standard we are, eh?

Aw, geez, just when I thought I was getting it right, you tell me "Wassup?" can have undertones and complexities that should influence my response.

I have always said, "Not much, how's it going with you?" if the 'wassup' greeting comes from a casual acquaintance. 99% of the time, the questioner does not care or want to know a real answer; it's like "how ya doing?"  They don't really want to hear how you're doing, it's just a ritual greeting.  I think!

Reading through this thread, I think the most instructive thing for NTs to do, in any culture, would be to take a few months to immerse themselves in a foreign culture whose language and gesticular (social) mores were very different (and quite confusing) to them.  I did this myself.  It's so humbling.  Living with my boyfriend, who I think is Asperger's, is also humbling.  The very angry way that AntiAspie feels about people with Aspergers, to me, resembles the anger that all human beings can feel when they misinterpret others as being wrong, insensitive, or in any way offensive.  Living w/ my boyfriend is requiring me to go through a deep dialogue so that all the small ways we offend and hurt one another can be made less opaque, more transparent, and better able to permit trust to grow and love to bloom.  It's actually VERY difficult to communicate this way.  But I know if I can keep trying, I will be a much better NT and human being, generally, with greater patience, fewer assumptions about what people mean, and a better ability to be presnt and open to what people are experiencing.

Or "Namuch. You?"