one of my best frend is realy depressed, she hasent been to school for over a week. we have talked via mesenger the last days and it worked fine untill yesterday when she told me that i coulden't understand anthing.
she have told me that she dosn't eat and have sucidal thought, wich i think is more that she hawe told most ppl.
i am realy woried about her, what can i do to help and suport here get past this.
Do her parents know why she hasnt been to school? Are they supporting her?
Try and be there for her to talk, but remeber that many people can get this, and very few actually attempt each time they feel like this, so dont let that worry you immensely, especially if she does have her family near her.
her relationshipp whit here parents is a part of the problem. she turned 18 some weeks ago and she wants to move alone, prfrebly to another city, but she cant do it whitout som economical suport from here parents, and they dont want her to leave.
noooo!!!!!!! what i feard hapened.
we talked, i came with a coment that i thought was harmless, but she didn't and now she hates me.
i feel rotten inside, this is probably the worst i felt ewer.
this is the first time in my life i realy wish i din't have AS.
olav its not your fault, you did not have the intention to upset her. Its possible that as she is depressed she is very highly sensitive, more than usual for the girl that you know, dont blame yourself.
People who are very depressed will look for hurt in peoples words when it isn't even there because they are using their depression as a saftey net because it may well be the only thing that they understand at that time because it has a lot of very strong emotions attached to it and will be playing heavily on everything she says and does. Indulging in self hatred is part of her depression so it's unlikely that she does hate you, she just wants a reason to feel worse so she can justify killing herself and it will be reasonable to her to do it as nobody likes her so no-one will miss her so she isn't hurting anyone. Suicide isn't as selfish as everyone likes to make out, it's just a very dark and lonely place to be.
My advice is to keep talking to her and to keep telling her that you like her and want to be her friend. Tell her that her hurting like this is hurting you and you will miss her very much if she does kill herself and nothing will ever change that. You have to take away her justification for killing herself or she may well do it.
I know this really puts the pressure on you to do something that is going to cause you a lot of stress, but you aren't responsible for the way she is feeling right now but you do need to do something for yourself and your friend.
I have to agree with brightman here - a lot of people when depressed can literally not see anything positive until they recover from their depression. This means that what you say to her may be taken completely the wrong way and interprated as an insult.
Keep telling her that you don't hate her and re-assure her as much as possible. When someone is so depressed they are taking things from friends the wrong way, they need more support.
I know how she feels.
Just tell her that you love her and that you'll be willing to do anything for her. If her parents are mentally abusing her, then I would highy recommend that you try to get her out of there.
Suicide isn't selfish. Suicide is escape. You need to help show her that she dosn't need to escape, and that she can deal with the problems being thrown at her.