The awful list of what a child with autism wants you to know is showing no sign of stoppping, its even been made into a news article.
The worst one -
Here are ten things every child with autism wishes you knew:
1. I am first and foremost a child -- a child with autism. I am not "autistic."
Thats like saying I am a person who lives in England, I am not English. :roll:
http://www2.townonline.com/parentsandkid...at=&page=1
On forums, yes, I have no idea how it is being represented as a news article.
I am not female, I am a person with femaleness.
I am not a mother, I am a person with parenthood.
I am not being sarcastic... I am a person with sarcasm. :roll:
Damn......I am not male, I am a person suffering from maleness (But, I'm not as manly as Gareth :razz: )
I am not a father, I am a person with parenthood. (Amber laughs at my pseudo-maniacal laugh.....
And yes, I am a person with sarcasm! :groupjump: :razz:
Ack, 1 out of three, I'm doomed.......TGIF, Oh well, time to have a shot of the birthday whiskey (I just turned 50 and am a certified "old fart) :twisted: ok, I'll shut up now!! :roll:
Peace
Amy, not everything in that list is bad. Unfortunately, the first one of the points is totally wrong.
At the end it tells you why it's in the news now (I read all of it to see what it says).
Work to view my autism as a different ability rather than a disability. Look past what you may see as limitations and see the gifts autism has given me. I may not be good at eye contact or conversation, but have you noticed that I don't lie, cheat at games or pass judgment on other people? Also true that I probably won't be the next Michael Jordan. But with my attention to fine detail and capacity for extraordinary focus, I might be the next Einstein. Or Mozart. Or Van Gogh.
They had autism, too. Be my advocate, be my friend, and we'll see just how far I can go.
Writer, consultant and parent of a child with autism, Ellen Notbohm is a columnist for "Autism/Asperger's Digest" and co-author of "1001 Great Ideas for Teaching and Raising Children With Autism Spectrum Disorders." Ellen's new book "Ten Things Every Child With Autism Wishes You Knew" will be released this fall by Future Horizons, Inc.
Oh dear, it might be quoted everywhere then.
The worst one -
1. I am first and foremost a child -- a child with autism. I am not "autistic."
I agree -- I think someone who views an Aspie/autie like this is totally misunderstanding Aspies & auties.
But, you know, I think the person writing this list -- and other NTs who ascribe to this sort of thinking -- might mean well.
My impression of the NT world out there is that, in order for them to accept someone who is not part of their natural group (say a family member), they try to "identify" with that other person. And, the easiest way for NTs to do this -- maybe the only way -- is that they have to imagine that other person is very much like themselves. If you look at the extended entry on that first point, it says:
My autism is only one aspect of my total character. It does not define me as a person. Are you a person with thoughts, feelings and many talents, or are you just fat (overweight), myopic (wear glasses) or klutzy (uncoordinated, not good at sports)?
What I read in that (and I'm being generous here) is that this NT really wants to accept the Aspie/autie individual (albeit on their terms!) and to do that he/she tries to recognize each of us as a "person" just like themselves.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's just too difficult for most NTs to accept other people who are quite different from themselves (e.g. Aspies/auties). The best way they can accept us is if they imagine us to be fundamentally like them (great "theory-of-mind", huh?).
So, to give this person the benefit of the doubt, I think they mean well, even though they are obviously misguided -- and screwing up true understanding in the process, unfortunately.
"So, to give this person the benefit of the doubt, I think they mean well, even though they are obviously misguided -- and screwing up true understanding in the process, unfortunately."
If it was just in one place, it wouldn't really matter, but its been like a chain letter. Its done the rounds of all the parents forums, mailing lists etc, and now is being used for a book.
No-one knows who actually wrote it, and what intentions they had for it.
If it was just in one place, it wouldn't really matter, but its been like a chain letter. Its done the rounds of all the parents forums, mailing lists etc, and now is being used for a book. No-one knows who actually wrote it, and what intentions they had for it.
Hmmmmm. That is not good. I agree -- it will just add to the misunderstanding. (Although, I still think I am on to something here with how I think NTs need to "identify" with someone in order to accept them. But, perhaps that's a discussion for another place and time....)
I have a question to those of you who find this article really dreadful - other than nit-picking the odd detail in its wording, have you got any actual factual criticism about its content? I am sometimes at a loss as to why NTs still bother trying to understand us at all, when any efforts on their part to try and get people to understand us and view us as different rather than defective gets slagged off in such a fashion :?
Having seen it appear chain letter style on so many forums, and then had NT parents telling autistics that they are wrong to even call themselves autistic and citing the list as 'proof' of how wrong they are, it gets REALLY tedious.
Have to just point out -
The road to hell is paved with good intentions!
(Hows that for devils advocate) :wink:
What about if we all write -
"10 things an autistic adult wishes you knew"?
and circulate it.
Suggestions?
1. I am autistic, not just an adult with autism. It is part of who I am.
I'll add it to the list, and put a footnote to the article that the list was written by members of the autistic community to express how they feel, not just one person. The original '10 things' article was anonymous so no-one knows where it came from.
