03-15-2008, 02:21 AM
03-15-2008, 03:52 AM
Arctoris Wrote:
This thread is over three years old and therefore posting here is extreme thread necromancy.
happens all the time, by members both old and new.
and it will continue to happen 
it can be useful, as there is a lot of knowledge buried in these archives.
also a lot of silly, but thats to be expected
04-04-2008, 04:47 AM
Apart from all this business of thread necromancy....
Well, I'm not sure that I "count," per se, as I was never officially diagnosed, but eventually I learned to fake their expected responses, motions, etc. in order to protect myself, from my parents, from my peers, from my teachers, from my more pill-happy doctors. I'd not make certain motions and I would try (often failing) not to freak out when something assaulted my senses so my mom wouldn't say I was "acting like a ***" and being "embarrassing." I eventually learned not to talk about my obsessions so much when my classmates and even some supposed friends confirmed my father's belief that if you show that you care about something too much, people will try to destroy it. I doodled in my class notebook, switching back and forth between that and school materials to avert suspicion, so my teachers wouldn't punish me for multitasking (or as they considered it, being distracted) when I'd get bored with the slow-as-molasses pace of some classes, for fear that an actual sketchbook would be taken away or thrown in the trash again. Now that I live on my own and am not so dependent on the approval and decisions of others, I wish I could go back to how I was before they made me change to protect myself and stop being so self-critical and insecure.
Well, I'm not sure that I "count," per se, as I was never officially diagnosed, but eventually I learned to fake their expected responses, motions, etc. in order to protect myself, from my parents, from my peers, from my teachers, from my more pill-happy doctors. I'd not make certain motions and I would try (often failing) not to freak out when something assaulted my senses so my mom wouldn't say I was "acting like a ***" and being "embarrassing." I eventually learned not to talk about my obsessions so much when my classmates and even some supposed friends confirmed my father's belief that if you show that you care about something too much, people will try to destroy it. I doodled in my class notebook, switching back and forth between that and school materials to avert suspicion, so my teachers wouldn't punish me for multitasking (or as they considered it, being distracted) when I'd get bored with the slow-as-molasses pace of some classes, for fear that an actual sketchbook would be taken away or thrown in the trash again. Now that I live on my own and am not so dependent on the approval and decisions of others, I wish I could go back to how I was before they made me change to protect myself and stop being so self-critical and insecure.
04-04-2008, 06:09 AM
Swede Wrote:
Don�t ask me how i do it but people just laugh at my odities and never give me a hard time about it. It might have to do with my low voice and standard serious expression combined with my maturity and reasoning (you can�t realy bully someone who obviusly have not the slightest fear of you and to whom you feel inferior). Even the NTs who are of the standard half neanderthal breed respect me. I am also improving my social skills all the time, i always say thank you whenever i see a situation that might need it (in sweden that is all the time, getting the ciggarete pack: Thank You, recieving the change: TY...), . I try and look people in the eyes when they are talking to me sometimes just to make sure they don�t get nervous. That sort of thing i do not feel is too hard to try and think of from time to time. Then again im not officialy diagnosed so i can�t realy say if im speaking from the perspective of an NT with autistic traits (which is a posibility, but thats a long list of traits, i recognise things all the time from reading the forum), or from that of someone on the spectrum.
The main social problem i have is that i can�t realy keep in touch with old friends, nor increase the time i spend with friends at school, i feel doomed to only have some friends at work and my relatives. Having a relationship with somone of the opposite sex seems almost redicolous.
Im thinking about pressing the submit button because especialy the last part seems to personal. Just writing stuff like this down is theraputical.
In no ways do i mean that you just have to trie harder, im just saying that for me confidence has been the key and i have been lucky to have been able to grow confidence as a child. I got bullied from time to time in 1-4th grade by the older children, but once i pushed someone up against the wall. I think that i after that more and more grew the attitude that "i am much more intelligent than you and if you still give me *** i can just push you up against the wall".
The main social problem i have is that i can�t realy keep in touch with old friends, nor increase the time i spend with friends at school, i feel doomed to only have some friends at work and my relatives. Having a relationship with somone of the opposite sex seems almost redicolous.
Im thinking about pressing the submit button because especialy the last part seems to personal. Just writing stuff like this down is theraputical.
In no ways do i mean that you just have to trie harder, im just saying that for me confidence has been the key and i have been lucky to have been able to grow confidence as a child. I got bullied from time to time in 1-4th grade by the older children, but once i pushed someone up against the wall. I think that i after that more and more grew the attitude that "i am much more intelligent than you and if you still give me *** i can just push you up against the wall".
That describes me somewhat as well. While I was bullied in middle school (who isn't?), nowadays people either leave me alone or think I'm "cool" and try to talk to me. I act strangely, there is no doubt about that, but because I don't lose my confidence and act nervous, they have no reason to bully me. That's all bullies do, is pick up on someone's weaknesses and harass them for it - it's a common behavior among most social vertebrates, and humans are no different. Of course, now that we have become a sapient species, many of our instinctive behaviors are detrimental or undesirable in modern day society.
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