Aspies For Freedom

This may not make any sense to you, but if it does...

Do any of you remember and wish that the school contact or case manager / case worker, case administrator who "dealt" with you had less dealings with you?  Did you feel they had your best interest or did they try to manipulate you or mess with you?  Did you wish that your parents knew when they did, I am guessing if they did, it was traumatic or routine altering, even thought they were suppsoedly advocating on your behalf and are suppose to be "on your side". When you had confusing, or if you had confusing dealings with this "authority figure/supposed support person: did you find it too exhasuting to communicate or relate to your parents?  
My question is also, Do you wish that the school official would leav you alone more - do you wish your parents were able to swicth your case worker if you didn't trust them anymore?

Also a poll - about being "burnt" by the person at school that was to be on your side...

Yes ATM very reasonable of you.  I am not saying people are mosters - I am trying to figure out the odds - like did my son/we his parents just get a little unlucky with his (schools case worker) we are trying to figure out how much harm it would do to try to get another one - we aren;t trying to hurt her - what if the next one is worse? (well I know that answer - we are outa there)
What you said about denial is true in this case ... she has more problems I think than my son has for sure... It's not that she may not mean well - it just may be she is too far gone in the system and just cares more about keeping her job -

case worker - works a case
my son is a person
even her title shows the problem

Help , ATM wrote : Perhaps those of you with more direct experience as a *student* under such a person can explain the psychology at work here?  Why did she insist upon treating me as a child, until the Administration got involved?  I find it condescending.  I know that she means well.  She genuinely cares about her students.  Someone help me to understand, please"

It does not have to be a "case worker" I am using that as a catch all name for who ever it is that is at school advocating for you child or whoever can change their schedule or add or take away support or modifications.  What you describe would be maybe under the "they were helpful" umbrella.  I am just wondering if the "one" main school offical type person/teacher/administrator/guidance counseller/school social worker/special ed teacher/case worker/case manager ended up - in hindsight - as more positive or more negative....
In our state, if your kid HAS AN IEP - they HAVE a caseworker -and I think in the whole country that is the law. IF you do not know who your case worker is - maybe that is good cuz he or she isn't messing with you (yet) or maybe you are being underserved and they are NOT doing as much as they can or should do for your kid.

Any comments are good here, they all relate somehow, I have picked up alot of tips and things to look out for just reading all the threads here that talk about experiences on the aspie/child/student end or perspective....
thanks for the bump

Oh yeah I guess I do have a case worker type person.  She's actually pretty nice.  I used to see her pretty often when she was collaborating with my parents to force me to actually complete my online CALM course (Career And Life Management.  Shudder.)  I think she's supposed to be checking up on me once a week at lunch but it's stopped actually happening.  Of course I haven't left a homework assignment incomplete since Chemistry last term, so...

I think she talks to my teachers about me every once and a while or something.  For the first few months I didn't know what she looked like (which is something, because she has extremely notable white hair.)

SF:  Actually it's more that better students take AP courses.  The courses themselves are harder and you usually get a lower mark than you would have in the mainstream course (my AP history teacher is scaling the whole classes' mark up 10% to compensate for this.  This puts all 8 of us at at least 85%. ^_^)  Holding people back in math is annoying, though; I think one of the reasons my school exists is to fight that.  If you finish a year ahead you can always retake the course to improve your mark (I know two or three people who have done this.)  You could upgrade it, though.

Thanks to all who posted - Korrigan, does your daughter not have an IEP?
Anyone else?
We spoke to our (personal masters in social work private guy today) we hired him to make the professionals at school worry - as he's an actual expert in the field - like a life coach who has been around -he's not about paperwork and posturing or trying to keep his job like the school folks - We are starting the process, after the meeting today - of making ds's case worker not be allowed to talk to him or ever pull him out of class again - she has to deal with us - she has repeatedly parroted back that she understands she is not to talk to him or mess with his routine - but she still does - we will have it in writing in his new IEP... we'll let her keep her school job - and make no waves there - she can keep doing paperwork - for the next month - but maybe next year we'll get rif of her - still the devil you know as opposed to the one you don't... and keep you enemies closer...just stay away from my son- he doens't trust you or understand a word you say - he know that you are trying to set him up (my sons words)!

anyone else? anything?

Oh, for anyone that cares - or was keeping rack - God bless you if you've been able to keep up. We decided to have our son moved to a self-contained classroom with a really great teacher with light in her eyes and a loving heart - and he will only be mainstremed (till school is out in 1 month) for gym, library, woodshop and social studies.  we are trying to give him a taste (of relative calm) so we can determine if next year he'll stay in his school at all - or homeschool or.... or....anyway, I did a thread/poll on to mainstream or not once...

I think that you will find - as I did - that the people who send their kids to private school are just plain different in their thinking - and education is a priority (not at the "status schools" mind you) and the way they rasie their kids is more old fashioned - you know the idea that parents teach morals - not schools... and therefore the kids are more free-tjinking as well.  I think you should look into them - they do not pay well though - at all. They also do not tolerate bad teachers - and they retain theri teachers for ever - the good ones - so it is hard to get a job - thought some catjolic shcools in iffy areas- are alwasy looking for aides - they do not pay well though they are appreciative any help they can get....go for it!

[Sorry to plug a rant into a serious thread like this, but this is just my way of saying what alot of people on this site say... that public schools are run by a bunch of idiots.
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Rant away - I love to see alot of different paths - Your rants has some close paralells - seeing the pitfalls other fell int, helps others to avoid them.... you know? I am already not worried about the "end result" of my son - it is the here and now I/we fight for him (as your parents did for you) - but I like to "hear" about those that "broke on thru to the other side" or "made it thru the rain, I kept my ppint of view" (both songs sorry, they just popped into my head.) It gives me support and a bit of encouragement - I always knew that we were not the only ones who thought such strange things about the purpose of education - and that it is not okay to be disrespectful to children, just becasue you think you can get away with it!   and that people in thier little piddly (someone said ****!) positions will try to exert power in the most ridiculous ways.! (Was that a rant? sorry)
Rants encouraged -
Got rants?
Got hope?
I do.

I bet ( I would bet!)if you called - or looked at all the pages on the IEP - you would find the slot case manager: ________ filled in. I know that my kids case manager has 57 other kids in my sons school -and not all of them know she even exists - the school gets paid alot of extra $ for each kid with an IEP, whether or not she does anything more than fill our paperwork (I wish all my kids manager did was paperwork!)

No, my son has a resource teacher and a regular teacher, and an aide and a case manager and the case manager has a superior that is called the head of special services.... There is a hierarchy.... the principal has less power than the case manager and director of special services.

Lucky you! Social services and child protectuve services has never been involved with us (over our dead bodies) but in order to have and IEP in the NJ buerocracy one MUST have a coordinator called a case worker or manager. (still pissed anout the term case - my kid is not a cse - the womans credentials say merely, learning specialist...

Oh crap earthmonkey -losing your eyesight sounds dreadful!

Hello - At 10:30 this morning - less than half hour ago - I dropped off the letter to the "case manager" and to the others that were cc'd (her boss). The last portion of this response to last weeks newly proposed IEP (the 8th this year) requests that she no longer has any dealings with our son....

(This is me waiting for the stuff to hit the fan)
I may not be on much as we just "called her out" on her slick double dealings from the year - I think she thought she had lulled us to sleep - but we figured it was time now that our son is safely tucked away - since Monday- in a self-contained class - with a brand new aide that is not infected by her demeanor and poor style of interaction.  I am not saying she hasn't worked hard at making paperwork - she has tried to bury us in it - she has been a tool to get what we want - but we cannot have her deal with our child.  
If she reacts badly to the - hey you can do paperwork and talk with us - but never speak to our child again- we will remove her as his "case manager".  I think we showed our hand enough to let her know we have paper work to back up the litany of lets call them errors in judgement.  Hope she doesn't want to go to the mat.  We feel our letter lets her save face - enough.
I st

I was just on the HArd to relax in general thread - intersitng reading and the I don't think I am anxious thread and I wonder if the difference between ADD/ADHD and ASD or them being co-morbid or not is the state of alertness an does that relate to anxiety or ability to relax? maybe the ability to realx can stop some anxiety - being bale to turn off or put blinders on.... Or is the reason why one gets distracted, because one can't focus or because one is tired and/or overwhelmed by hyper focusing on all the stimuli not related to task on hand or the boring task on hand cannot compete with the action? OR does anxiety pop up with aspies because they want to complete something and can't do it so easily- like my son.
I don't think my son is "constantly alert" and he would never be considered hyper, excitable and enthusiastic yes - I still can't figure why his EEG was suppoed to say he was ADHD - but he was Dx'd with aspergers after that and with a differnt doctor...
A certain amoutn of anxiety definitly goes with aspergers no? IS that because of sensitivities and sensory do you think or more so from hyper or constant alertness? My son is very AWARE of details and sounds and smells at school - and he gets overloaded by that.  Also all the trying to figure out what is really going on and translating actions and separating the action and the spoke wowrd and trying to make them gel.... He is not relaxed at school - he walks all crouched over like he is carrying a back-pack. (new "placement" should fix that)Going to get him now - hope the day went well! I'll be able to tell based on how is walks out!

Who knows what I am asking? I figure I'd post here as who knows if anyone will read this and relate....  (I think this thread is dead anyway.)

Any comments? theories?