Aspies For Freedom

Full Version: My Goddess A poem that I wrote (Please read the Disclaimer)
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WinkDisclaimer:
This poem is my interlectual property; if you wish to use this poem for anything please ask my permssion and i must be credited for the work.
I reserve the right to use as little or as much cliché as i feel like using.
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Introduction:
This is about a person at college, who i like but i lack the courage and conversation skills to ask out. Sad


"I Wrote:
My Goddess

Her beauty like a beacon shining
Across the land and sea
A shining light into the night
A sunrise just for me

Her voice as soft as angels’ wings
Sings out upon the air
Sweet symphony of the night
Calling out to me

Her laughter like the summer rain
Washing over the earth
Melodious and beautiful
A comfort just for me


I encorage Cooments and Constructive critisism.

This was an accidental post can a moderator delete it?
Why? It's good! It's positive, not defensive or agressive. I like it.
I accidentaly posted this one with a smiley in the wrong place and posted again
I like it very much. Echo hyke's comments. Like your disclaimer, too.

Constructive criticism: It sounds unfinished (if that makes any sense to you). Or maybe that was your intent...

Anyway, that's it, fwiw.
It was suposed to end like that. most of my poems ar long and depessing but not this one.

Stormcrow Wrote:
This was an accidental post can a moderator delete it?


I would, but I don't want to also delete the existing comments. It's probably easiest to just redirect people to here:

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthre...?tid=13060

Stormcrow Wrote:
It was suposed to end like that. most of my poems ar long and depessing but not this one.

Ok then! Big Grin Nice work.

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