05-09-2008, 04:46 PM
I've been told the same but it depends on the anxiety and such...like I needed to get over my fear of sharp objects but i'm advised to avoid triggering things that would make me seriously anxious (like the news)
05-09-2008, 04:46 PM
05-10-2008, 05:26 PM
my psychologist said my AS is part of my personality and not to worry what other people think...
More people should listen to him
More people should listen to him
05-22-2008, 04:36 PM
tenaciouscj Wrote:
kattoo13 Wrote:
Have any of you had any medical professionals say that you or your child should force yourself through situations that cause you anxiety?
Yes, very often. It is obvious to me that they have absolutely NO IDEA how much mental and physical energy aspies consume in trying to deal with almost constant levels of anxiety.
Does the social programme include techniques such as relaxation? If there is no "debriefing" after very anxiety-provoking situations, it also means the programme is rather lacking and I don't blame you for taking your son out of it.
The therapist is acting immaturely and petulantly by saying she won't help your son any more with his IEP and is probably not much loss.
There is a dearth of "programs" out there. Schools are "trying" to create as they go all ad-hoc - no surprise then that this way of approaching so called modifications - using a kids stress after the fact as an indicator - instead of planning ahead of time - doesn't suit an aspie who likes structure or order and routine...
As far as the bold part... I really can't help but think and then ask if it is not anxiety being dealt with....
you wrote " to deal with almost constant level of anxiety" at least in my sons case, I think isn't it just him dealing with " a constant barrage of sensory input ? Too much input.. I don't think that should be called anxiety - *anxiety seems to place blame on the individual not handling it whereas too much going on is an outsider force) Pardon me but I want to be specific in terminology - as anxiety makes the professionals want to "Cure" you as if insanity comes after anxiety or something... Are we talking about similar things or are these feelings distinctly different ?
05-23-2008, 12:49 PM
Pakrat Wrote:
No, I meant that we often feel "off balance" and "anxious" because we do not know what is expected of us or if we do, we can't meet up with the expectations. Also, we easily become overwhelmed by the barrage of sensory stimuli that comes our way every day.
If you think anxiety is a bad way of describing the feelings of unease or distress, I am quite happy to say that aspies consume much mental and physical energy in their efforts to cope with everyday life.
I never said there should be any blame placed upon the aspie individual for feelings of anxiety, discomfort, distress etc. - In fact, I would argue the very opposite.
If you think anxiety is a bad way of describing the feelings of unease or distress, I am quite happy to say that aspies consume much mental and physical energy in their efforts to cope with everyday life.
I never said there should be any blame placed upon the aspie individual for feelings of anxiety, discomfort, distress etc. - In fact, I would argue the very opposite.
Oh, I didn't think that anyone on here was putting the blame or that even the word anxiety is bad - but that OUT THERE, "they" tend towards that and I am trying to change the people near my son - their vocabulary as such...
I forgot momentarily how much my son wants to be told what is expected.... there is that for sure... thanks for the clarification...
05-23-2008, 04:39 PM
EnglishLulu Wrote:
I'm not sure that just giving up and conceding to your son's demands is necessarily the right way forward. We all have to do some things some times that we don't particularly like or don't feel comfortable with, even as adults. And 'letting him get his own way' doesn't really prepare him for how to overcome difficulties as he grows up and becomes an adult. It just teaches avoidance and running away from problems.
Wasn't there some way of addressing his anxieties within or alongside the group? I appreciate that seems difficult as the support workers didn't seem particularly helpful or supportive but maybe instead of having this stand-off between the responsible adults in this situation, the adults could have made more of an effort to resolve the problem and come up with some way of working together?
Just trying to be a bit of a devil's advocate, but also trying to make a point. I wasn't diagnosed as a child and as a result was forced to act outside my comfort zone and managed to do that and overcome difficulties.
Wasn't there some way of addressing his anxieties within or alongside the group? I appreciate that seems difficult as the support workers didn't seem particularly helpful or supportive but maybe instead of having this stand-off between the responsible adults in this situation, the adults could have made more of an effort to resolve the problem and come up with some way of working together?
Just trying to be a bit of a devil's advocate, but also trying to make a point. I wasn't diagnosed as a child and as a result was forced to act outside my comfort zone and managed to do that and overcome difficulties.
I see you point very clearly - I think that the very fact that a school doesn't have set policies yet, or lacks consistency increases the instances of a child being treated unevenly and for auites/aspies increases their confusion. By all means the world is not consistent and the sooner your kid learns that in a few cases - they should just do what they are told - school work wise, the better. ADults in authority howver, if not directed and trained properly can do damage that will end up adding more diagnosis to the end of others. SO we do have to be careful about things. Totally pick your battles. (figuratively - we are not really in a battle) I know that we did not have a stand off - far from it -with our sons school this year (this is the 1st year we have had to interact officially - not that he is in a public school) We had to be really nice, and really patient and really ontop of things. We just had to bring the people along with us - to get them to see it our way - to get them to think that it was their idea, and have what is right for our son fit within the schools framework. If they can't do it after all, we just will pull him out of there. No animosity.
Our son has to do some things, many that he does not want to do. However, specifically he has in his IEP that he takes longer to do his math, he then only has to do 1/2 of the math homework evryone else does - Fair is not always equal. HE spends more time at it then others do anyway - we will not enable him to slack off- but the way the school had been dealing with him had caused that to happen - and because he is clever, they didn't even notice it. They gave him good grades anyway.