Aspies For Freedom - thread starts to go on a tangent

M Wrote:

Is it annoying to people when a thread starts to go off on a tangent.  It starts out with someone asking an important questions and soon people are having some silly personal arguments that have nothing to do with the issue being discussed.

Please stop and think before you reply to a post.

1.  Are you replying to a troll?

2.  Is your emotional experience going to help someone else or answer the question asked?

3.  You have already expressed your point of view and further arguing is not going to change anyone's mind.

I am going to try this for a while.   I am really sick of the silly arguing and trolling on this forum sometimes.

Starting a new thread might be better than going on a tangent because then people who are looking for important information do not have to search through more than 30 pages of trash to find answers.

Bingo.  Where can I get my union card? To each their own but I think that I will try to come up with a signature line that says something about being a card carrying member of the "M" union movement.

Conversely, a certain amount of tangentizing and lightness should be tolerated and can bring out positive results and enlightenment.

Furthermore, I noticed that a couple of people who started threads - wrote on the thread title - serious - like to communicate how important the topic is to them. To me that meant. No nonsense.

ANd dare I say for some people, taking a topic to it's end would be important for closure sakes.  Maybe when the person who starts the topic is satisfied, they can post THE END and thanks or something.

(I know I sound like I like rules - it's a dichotomy - I like freedom and rules,  spontaneity and planning, go figure)

M, is this post a tangent in your rule book - or am I following your line of thinking thread properly enough in order to further your post?

**************************
Union card-carrying member of "M"

(parent)

I should have let the parent comment go because I didn't think it applied to me - (I just thought I'd (remind) others that parents exist or no one would be here (that part is a joke, get it> Wink

okay it wasn't a funny joke - I never said I was funny. Anyway, if (when?)I have offended anyones sensibilitities at least I know I did in unintentionally, so to me I wouldn't take personal.

M, it IS kinda funny how this thread got all KApplooey for a bit, isn't it?

M, good question - I dopn't know the rules on that... maybe in the M union - it would be agreed that if someone was misunderstanding something they could clarify - but a PM that seemed critical might be even MORE likely to SEEM like harrassment...

For goodness sakes - go back and COUNT how many times M has posted on this thread- like twice? M is not enflaming anything here....
Wow, Who knew? I didn't know that there was another thread somewhere - that was all controversial. M posted this thread and the topic seemed pretty interesting to me. about tangents ironically - It seemed like a nice quiet place to converse about rules of the forum, the rules of PM'ing as M isn't sure about them it seems and M seemed to want to understand better how it came about that a post of hers was considered rude by a (not named) parent at some unspecified time. Though now, parents have been insulted, Nt's, mothering techniques, though none by M's post/s in this thread - that I can see. Just saying.

Korrigan, how'd you get thrown under the bus?

Sorry to repeat post- I'll be more careful in the future as I am guessing it's probably rude or something (not being sarcastic). But, I am pretty amazed that posters that seem to be so nice and deferential and polite (except when they think they are being attacked) are the ones that someone asks to leave. I have seen wholly outrageous comments thrown around and the reverse happens.
An observation - and no I don't have anyone in mind - I don't keep track of names very well. There are only a few posters whom I really follow.
M - how is this for a tangent?

jiggeryqua Wrote:

atypical Wrote:

Though now, parents have been insulted, Nt's, mothering techniques

Nope, none of that has happened - though individual parents have been insulted (myself and kattoo, by kattoo and myself). A couple of NT's are claiming they're offended - offense is just a form of social blackmail though. I fail to see how you can insult a technique. You can certainly criticise techniques - even mothering techniques. Maybe that is a taboo for you - but in that case a communications medium that crosses cultural boundaries may not be the place for your sensitivities.

** Jiggerqua wrote (among other things) :" You can certainly criticise techniques - even mothering techniques. Maybe that is a taboo for you - but in that case a communications medium that crosses cultural boundaries may not be the place for your sensitivities. "***

Maybe I'm tired, but I can't seem to figure out how your response has anything to do with what I said or anyone said (except you). I really have no idea what you are talking about and how any of what you and kattoo were posting about had anything to do with the thread about - tangents/rules for posting. Or were you being ironic and trying to do the opposite? As you agreed to, noone except you and kattoo were insulting anyone else - (so your statement that none of this happened confuses the heck out of me) though whether or not either of you was actually offended I've no idea. I just felt I had to speak up about how it seemed M (who I know as well as you - not at all) was getting a bad rap and not even saying anything.

EvilZakkie Wrote:

M Wrote:

example of tangent?

Why don't people send a private message explaining what they mean if they feel someone has misunderstood them.

Because it's a public forum.

It could just as easily be said that it would have been better for you to send a private message to Kattoo about not liking her response, rather than starting an entirely new thread to complain about it.

As a general rule, avoiding posting in a thread that may blow up is a good thing, but starting a new thread to complain about it is a bad idea, probably worse than if you had of just ranted in the other thread - now drama has spread to two threads, rather than just one.

Basically, people aren't idiots, and they'll always work out what you're referring to after a while...

Sorry M another tangent:

What happened here... - which was ironically quite a tangent - and I notice you follow your rule of not answering back or you went to sleep another good idea!- So somehow this thread ran away, someone took it - maybe it will come back or you'll try again- I love the topic - IIt seem sto me you tried to avoid this (drama - I guess on another thread and it followed?) and further more - it seems to me - you started a thread about how to deal with it and then asked a simple question about when it is proper to use the PM - can it be used to help stop misunderstandings. I am a supposed NT and this is all tricky without set rules - there are alot of kids in this playground.

...if you pull a thread that's wound around a spool taunt it forms a natural tangent...

...if you keep pulling it starts to unwind and more and more of gets stuck in the tangent...

...if you don't stop pulling the thread comes off entirely and you realise you're analogy wasn't quite as clever as you initially thought...

Ironically, this thread seems to be not actually about tangents (which can be quite entertaining actually) but about miscommunication. I find this ironic because the title of the thread is a miscommunication in itself and my understanding of irony is only slightly clearer than that of Alanis Morriset ('Slike RAI-EE-AIN, on your wedding day.)

Hopefully by this point you've forgotten what you were arguing about. I mean, I have. But just in case, I suggest everyone try to be nice and considerate and to assume any insults are innocent and unintentional. If that doesn't work I don't know how to fix it Sad

Weren't only two people arguing?

oh they were miscommunicating!

maybe not, doesn't matter

AP - you fixed it! (not being sarcastic) Loved your thread pulling!

Alias Pseudonym Wrote:

...if you pull a thread that's wound around a spool taunt it forms a natural tangent...

...if you keep pulling it starts to unwind and more and more of gets stuck in the tangent...

...if you don't stop pulling the thread comes off entirely and you realise you're analogy wasn't quite as clever as you initially thought...

Ironically, this thread seems to be not actually about tangents (which can be quite entertaining actually) but about miscommunication. I find this ironic because the title of the thread is a miscommunication in itself and my understanding of irony is only slightly clearer than that of Alanis Morriset ('Slike RAI-EE-AIN, on your wedding day.)

Hopefully by this point you've forgotten what you were arguing about. I mean, I have. But just in case, I suggest everyone try to be nice and considerate and to assume any insults are innocent and unintentional. If that doesn't work I don't know how to fix it Sad

Sorry I meant to reply to this post...
love the thread pulling...

Bella Wrote:

If you don't care whether you insult people or look bad, why is it that you are here again?

Um...to reply to this thread. What do you not understand? I already explained that. At this point, it's just a joke to me. What are you trying to do? Be the big hero because you've always been bullied? lol Pu-lease.