Aspies For Freedom

I've been told that NAS are running a workshop on writing "social stories" in my town at the end of this month.

I did a quick google to find out about "social stories", a lot of the examples I found seemed so boring...

Do they work? Have other parents found them useful ? Please let me know your thoughts, cos if they are of benefit I'll go along and learn to write them for my daughter.

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I think social stories are of benefit for a rather narrow period- say 4th grade - 7th or 8th, tops. After that your kid will rebel I predict.

The best ones are short and to the point. You talk about where you are going, what will happen there (briefly), and what is expected socially of the Aspie child. I wrote them, my husband wrote them for about 2 years when Hope was in middle school if I recall.

I felt the social worker we used til very recently was also helpful as she would explain the social landscape to Hope when we weren't able to communicate with her about it for whatever reason. Find a social worker who is young, attractive and good with kids- advanced degrees beyond social work AREN'T necessary imo. A prepubescent boy might relate better to another male also.

Talk therapy is effective in and of itself for a lot of people no matter what the shrink's credentials. I think too they function as "friends" and help the child feel not so alone...

I hear sample ones are on the internet somewhere. Check with Barb Kirby on the OASIS site. Hope this helps!

Perhaps they have improved - the ones I've seen seemed rather banal. I cannot speak for others, who may well have positive things to say, but I found them to be too restrictive. People in real life simply do not follow a script, and if there was any deviation from the social story in a given situation it was perceived as a whole new scenario with no predictable rules.

There are too many variables. We can rehearse what to say and do for a bus journey, for instance; and then the bus is late, or has a male driver instead of a female one, or the seat he was planning to sit in is already occupied...

Any of these mean that the social story that we spent ages on is now null and void. I have given up. We now merely discuss what we plan to do, and just a few of the ways that the plan may fail; how we will cope with failures in general by making changes to the plan; and, most of all, reinforce that changes to planned activities aren't necessarily disasters.

PS Our social worker had experience with autistic kids- a big plus.

I also feel Hope needed someone she could talk to about her private concerns, someone to vent to...

Ellen

I have found a social worker really helpful too.
Even though I have some good friends around me now, I still need someone impartial who I can ask, and someone who is not connected to my friends so can give me an 'outsider' perspective.

It does very much depend on the social worker. The first one I had was nice, but didn't really know about autism. She was willing to learn but I had to explain pretty much everything to her from the beginning about autism

I now have another social worker who knows about autism and is also really willing to speak to my support worker and Neuro-behavioural specialist so that he can further his knowledge. He asked my permision first, but I was happy for him to do this as it makes sense for all the people who work with me to communicate.

Regarding social stories, I would agree that they are of some use, but only limited use and can never really prepare you for the fact that anyone could say anything at any time! They're pretty good for the basics of social interaction though.

Tony Attwood talks about ways to use Social stories in his Complete Guide to Asperger Syndrome.

The reason why I was thinking about "social stories"...

My daughter is coping fine at school (she is 6), is actually quite popular despite being rather "aloof" at times. She's fine about travel (loves it in fact).

The problem is her response to adult visitors at home. She is fine with visiting kids and teens, but she doesn't like adults visiting. Sometimes she'll go mute and walk around with her eyes closed, or (more frequently nowadays) she'll just tell them "I don't like you, you annoy me, when are you going?"

I think she just doesn't like to "share my attention". She had a big down on my brother for 2 years, then came out with "When are you and Uncle Bill getting married" ! I explained to her about families, and that you can't marry your brother, and since then she's started responding to him and he even gets the odd hug or kiss.

I've explained that grown-ups need time with other grown-ups occasionally, just like she likes to play with other children sometimes. I told her that saying these things upset people and made Mum feel bad.

So when her Dad came to visit around New Year (we split up some years back), she stood at the top of the stairs saying "Is he going yet?" In a loud voice.

I was hoping to be able to devise some sort of social story to cover these issues.

Social stories work, and videos or movies that model the behaviors can also be effective for a visual learner. We have also done role play with some success. The important thing is that the child see it as something fun and not a parent bossing around. Of course, if you make a little book for your child then s/he can sleep with it under the pillow at night and dream about it.  I don't know why, but this is very popular here. The osmotic learning never worked for me in college, but maybe my children are more fortunate.

I have some social stories i made on my group ,if you need specific ones just ask im happy to do them for you.
i will not post my link please pm me and i will forward the link
shell