Aspies For Freedom

I've always thought that most of morality can be summed up by the phrase "maximise interpersonal choice".

e.g: A person who bullies someone into doing something they didn't want to is taking away that persons options, thus bullying is immoral. On the other end, a person who feels they have to self-sacrafice for the benefit of others, and does not try to get past this mindset is also immoral by this modal, as they are deliberately limiting their own choices.

It makes for plenty of grey areas, but then, which system doesn't?

Aside from all the obvious ones (murder, sexual assualt, etc, etc), there's deliberate deception, intimidation, irrational insults & groupism...

* Pathological small talk (when people insist on talking about insignifigant things, and demand you pay attention to them. Also when people go out of their way to make sure a conversation remains on topics that no-one could possibly have a difference of opinion about)

* Emotional pleas in logical debates.

* People pointing out obvious things repeatedly.

* Conversational inefficiency (e.g. business meetings when they spend several hours convincing people that everything's okay, then spending only ten minutes or so dealing with actual issues. Also when people talk for long periods of time about how stressed they are in order to point out how something could be done differently).

Deception, intentional hurtfulness, pettiness, pretty much anything that result from a people failing to respect themselves or others.

Hard to consider people in general.  Some people wear me out and others do not.  If you mean in a crowd-type situation, like a big reception, then I tire of having the same conversation over and over. The speed with which speakers change and general hubbub is not pleasant.  It often seems that the jollity is forced, but I think that I am projecting with that one.

Much certainty attached to (a), not much to (b) since it didn't really make sense to me.

a) Rapists, diddlers.
b) Dressing or acting a certain way, just to *** attention. Imposing your beliefs.

This morning I received a PM  from someone.

This person tells me that I am adding to attacks on GuessWho.


I have NOT attacked GuessWho, I understand his condition and I also understand that often HE appears to misunderstand what is said.

I was trying to obtain an answer to his remarks, without success it would seem which is why on post #35 I stated that it was obvious that I wasn't going to have an answer.

The person also said that I post righteous media articles-but in reality seem to attack someone whom the PM poster perceives has good intentions.

To anyone else who has perceived my questioning GuessWho as attacking him I am truly sorry that was not my intention, I am aware that I can seem to be too blunt & I try my best not to be so.

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This PM came from a person who is desperate for an edit button And who has misused edit buttons on another forum eg editing all posts / parts of posts & PM's
The person used PM's on the other forum to manipulate & divide.

I have already contacted Gareth with my concerns re edit button on PM's some while ago.
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I received a PM from this person some while ago, accusing me of undermining same on a thread ?????
( I had allegedly written "Only a doctor should diagnose"  ) I hadn't written this & asked the poster to re read my post... I did receive an apology for that one.

( I have written about this in order that readers can see how trivial this was & how easily the person is offended.)

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Due to this person' past behaviour I have kept all PM's from the other forum edited & unedited as hard copies.

I have the evidence and if I need to I will use it.

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The other forum was the first of such that I had belonged to & I was conscious of keeping my privacy, as far as anyone can on the internet.

When on a thread, I dared to literally say "I disagree  with x remark " ( no more !), this person posted my real name on the forum, which the moderators kindly removed.
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When I joined THIS forum, it wasn't long before the person made contact 'very nicely',
I knew that the person knew too much about me, so THAT is why I have posted all of my details here....I removed that threat.

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I REFUSE TO BE MANIPULATED  & BULLIED BY PM.

IF YOU HAVE A VALID COMMENT TO MAKE DO SO IN PUBLIC.

I am sure that a fair few on the forum have already received PM's re. big bad WFM

To those of you that have, that is your business but I truly hope that you don't become hurt by this person as I and others have been.

Having said now all that I need to say, I shall take the advice from 'internet bully' and totally ignore anything that this person says.

But be warned I will not hesitate to involve the moderators  & anyone else if I need to.

Thanks GuessWho for your answer, I will need to go & do some work,i will get back to you later.


NOT AT YOU

GuessWho, if you read what you have written & what you meant, they appear to me to not be saying the same thing.

You have only used books as reference here  & it looks to me, that you have chosen parts that suit you, many people do do this.
My comments are:-

#1Many Muslims live piously now, I used to live among many & took the opportunity to learn some of their language, this was a two way street, insofar as they appreciated my efforts & gave me information about their lifestyle.

#2 nakedness / semi nakedness & complete or almost full complete coverage is a matter of culture, geography, history & personal choice.

With regard to the 'history', in the UK at least, Victorian  & Edwardian men often became very excited over a glimpse of an ankle or wrist.

Your remark " I must say I felt a sense of reverence for how attractive a woman respectfully dressed can be", could well be considered distasteful by many women.
Do you say the same about men?

I am still working on my house & when it is hot, I work in a bikini top & shorts ( yes even at my age ).
Male builders work in shorts under the same conditions.
I can't see anything wrong with that.

Males & females go onto the beach wearing very little clothing, do you think that it is OK for the men, but not the women?

In my opinion, it isn't your thoughts that can be considered offensive, so much as the way you project them.
If you had said attractively or suitably dressed, this would have come across better than respectfully dressed.
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Separately, I decided not to respond to most of your posts because, many people have given you advice which you have asked for & you do not listen.
So to respond would be a waste of my time, when there are people who do need help & will listen.

I will now advise you as I do my sons whether you take any notice is entirely your choice you are an adult, albeit a struggling one & can make your own decisions.

I have told my boys that to discuss  their opinions of certain subjects outside of the house is not a good idea as they can get into serious trouble from others by so doing.
Politics...NO
Sexual orientation....NO
Religion...NO
Sexual problems ie not being able to get a girl friend...NO

Generally these subjects are better being discussed with close friends or relatives, or by PM with someone that you can trust.

I am quite new to the forum & know very little history, so I have only touched the tip of the iceberg regarding knowing people, or at least knowing their internet personalities.

Many / most people here are very nice & are kind & helpful & many are / have been trying to help you.
For your own sake, please listen, assimilate & try to amend  your perception.
You can learn, like many of we older ones have already done.

Perhaps if you do this, you might be more likely to find a partner.

I am an agnostic believer.
I try to practise the nutral human ethics.

Very good,Woman from Mars...!!!

My moral philosophy can be summed up with:

"Try to minimize the total amount of suffering and misery in the world while at the same time respect personhood and autonomy of others."

The latter part is important because, though I tend toward utilitarianism in general, a purely utilitarian ethic, such as Peter Singer's, would be very dangerous in the hands of folks like the "Autism Speaks" people. I don't believe in "inherent" rights (IMO all rights are legal constructs of societies), but legal rights are necessary to prevent the totalitarian, eugenicist tendencies of pure utilitarianism.

I like the idea of trying to be mindful of my actions and how they could negatively impact others. I don't want to be the kind of person who does every good deed with some sort of agenda.

What I find irritating about people................those that are stingy skin flints,giving with strings attached. People who think small talk is worth my time, people who think I should be okay with social lies. Deception etc. And of course any fundamentalist religion gets on my last nerve.

I think the most defining thing about my moral philosophy is the belief that the stronger have the duty to protect, help and defend the weaker, and the most despicable thing in this world is a bully or an abuser, someone who takes advantage of that power difference with malice.  Furthermore, anyone in a position of power who sees abuse happening and does nothing to stop it or help those in need has forfeited their right to authority, and the victim has full moral right to strike back however necessary if only to prevent further harm to themselves and those in a similar position.

Free to do a lot of things, but when other people are involved I must be respectful, considerate and never deceitful, if I want something from them. When I can help someone I try to.

I find to be morally offensive deceit, abuse, and violence in all its forms. I might have missed something, but most evil in the world is a result of the above.

I also have no right to be prejudiced against:
for obvious reasons, what people are born into
people whose lifestyle choices are different to mine, unless these choices involve harming people. It's none of my business what the rest of the world thinks.

Wag more - barK less