And what kind of man might that be Max[besides men who are physically abusive]? When it comes to young NT women in their 20s, there's more than just that type of guy they're deceptive with.
You see, I dont physically or emotionally abuse women; However I certainly Do expect them to Reciprocate for the attention(even affection)I give to them! A lot of the NT women my age Ive met and been with for the past 10 years seem to be unable or unwilling to do that. I suspect it might be cuz they dont know what it is that they want so they act on their emotional impulses. When their feelings change they try to back out cuz they're not mature enough to be responsible for someone elses feelings besides their own. I know what it is that I want and I ONLY want to be with others who also know what they want from now on.
08-31-2007, 07:33 PM
09-13-2007, 10:50 AM
But do very many people know exactly what they want from life?
hrick
09-13-2007, 11:42 AM
I missed the the first Trust thread, but taking what content I could from Ziyaret's comment
To quote the question from Ziyaret:
And what kind of man might that be Max[besides men who are physically abusive]?
How about those who are extremely controlling, jealous etc... or provide intense pressure because they see every encounter as requiring a quid pro quo affair. (Not suggesting that is neccessarily the nature of what you do, just saying some do).
Women's brains and hearts operate differently, just as NT and AS are different. To expect someone to automatically be on the same emotional level as you relative to a relationship, especially early in the relationship is simply unfair. Affection grows at different rates. That does not make them untrustworthy. It may in fact make them more trustworthy in that it indicates they do not give their heart lightly. Once given they may in fact be extremely loyal. I personally fail to understand those who proclaim to be "in love" with every new beau they meet or those that think so little of themselves that they would physically share themselves with anyone they date. (And yeah, I am extremely old fashioned that way) But seriously, moral issues aside that response is simply phernomes operating. To my mind, forced proof of affection seems to me to be one of the fastest ways to undercut and diffuse true affection. Sometimes patiently waiting reaps huge benefits. (Now if I could just teach Hrick that waiting lesson as pertains to other things).
Just one person's perspective.
Mom
To quote the question from Ziyaret:
And what kind of man might that be Max[besides men who are physically abusive]?
How about those who are extremely controlling, jealous etc... or provide intense pressure because they see every encounter as requiring a quid pro quo affair. (Not suggesting that is neccessarily the nature of what you do, just saying some do).
Women's brains and hearts operate differently, just as NT and AS are different. To expect someone to automatically be on the same emotional level as you relative to a relationship, especially early in the relationship is simply unfair. Affection grows at different rates. That does not make them untrustworthy. It may in fact make them more trustworthy in that it indicates they do not give their heart lightly. Once given they may in fact be extremely loyal. I personally fail to understand those who proclaim to be "in love" with every new beau they meet or those that think so little of themselves that they would physically share themselves with anyone they date. (And yeah, I am extremely old fashioned that way) But seriously, moral issues aside that response is simply phernomes operating. To my mind, forced proof of affection seems to me to be one of the fastest ways to undercut and diffuse true affection. Sometimes patiently waiting reaps huge benefits. (Now if I could just teach Hrick that waiting lesson as pertains to other things).
Just one person's perspective.
Mom